How Caregivers Can Enjoy the Holidays

By Jacqueline Marcell

Caring for a chronically ill loved one can be one of life's greatest challenges. During the holidays, when even more responsibilities are added to an already stressful schedule, caregivers can often feel guilty and frustrated for not being able to accomplish all the tasks they once could. Additionally, fond memories of past holidays, when the loved one was still healthy, can create a downward spiral with feelings of loss and sadness.

More than 50 million people, one in every five Americans, are helping loved ones who can no longer help themselves. But when caring for another, caregivers often neglect their own well-being, oftentimes not even seeing themselves as caregivers, but simply as someone doing what any loving family member would do. And even though they do so much, they often feel that they are not doing enough, or that what they are doing could be done better. I lived this heartache when I cared for my elderly parents for several years. Both had numerous health problems, as well as the beginning of Alzheimer's disease. How I wish I'd known then how to cope with the stress, tears and sorrow, and how to manage the additional strain of each holiday season. If I had only known to take these steps, I could have managed everything so much better and continued to get enjoyment from a time of year that I had always loved.

Nurture Yourself
You can't be an effective caregiver if you are so stressed that you get sick, too. As hard as it is to find the time and motivation, realize that it's imperative that you take good care of yourself.

• Eat healthy: Set limits on high-fat and processed foods, caffeine and sugar-laden treats that can increase fatigue.
• Exercise often: Take a walk, stretch, lift weights, do isometrics.
• Get proper sleep: Take naps when necessary.
• Meditate: Practice deep breathing and visualization.
• Attend a support group regularly: Solutions will present themselves.
• Get respite care for your loved one: The break will help you.
• Do things you enjoy: Read, play music, work on hobbies or crafts, go to movies, etc.
• Use a hand sanitizer: Viral and bacterial infections can be reduced.
• Treat depression: If chronically depressed, find a therapist, and ask your doctor to consider prescribing an anti-depressant.
• Get yearly physicals and all appropriate tests: This includes a mammogram, prostate cancer screening, colonoscopy, etc.