Five Things Women Do That Drive Men Away

Men are from Mars and Women are from Venus, or so it seems when you consider the widely different ways we think, feel and act. The problem is that we too often expect our partners to think and behave as we do. MarsVenus.com has put together the following list of common things that women do, quite unknowingly, that drive men away. To have a happier relationship, try to avoid these behaviors as much as possible.

1. Telling Him What to Do
Are you constantly telling your man how to drive, how to dress, how to behave? Women are good at making improvements, but this is a highly sensitive area for men. The most important thing to a Martian is feeling like he is doing a good job. Question his competence and you'll not only hurt him, but you'll meet a wall of resistance.

Instead of telling him what to do, try asking for his opinion. Martians thrive in an environment where they are the experts, so help him be the expert. Instead of saying, "Honey, you should do this," ask his opinion: "Honey what do you think of this?" This allows him to share his thoughts and you will engage him in a conversation about whatever issue is on your mind. This simple trick will help you bring about changes in your man without telling him what to do.

2. Breaking Into His Cave
This is a big "no-no" for Venusians. When a Martian has a problem, he goes to his cave (becomes quiet and withdrawn) to solve it. This is normal behavior, and during these times, he doesn't want to talk or be disturbed. If you follow him into his cave, or pressure him to talk, you're likely to encounter a fire-breathing dragon. When a Martian is forced out of his cave before he is ready, it's a bit like waking a sleeping giant.

If you give your Martian the space to work his issues by himself, you will show him that you trust him. Trusting a Martian to do his best is one of the greatest gifts a Venusian can give to her partner. So enjoy the time, see a movie, go out with friends, or simply relax. He'll be back soon enough.

3. Mothering and Smothering Him
Men can be big babies, so they're easy to mother, and of course some mothering is readily accepted. The problem is when mothering becomes smothering. In effect, you're saying he isn't grown-up. He isn't competent. He can't handle things on his own. That offends him. Also, mothering makes it difficult for him to see you in a romantic way. Instead, trust him to handle his own issues, and when he doesn't, let him deal with the repercussions. When he needs your help, he'll ask.

4. Asking Him With 'Could You ...?'
It may seem like a minor point, but when you say, "Could you take the trash out?" you're questioning whether or not he is capable of doing it. Instead, ask "Would you take the trash out for me?" This shows you have confidence that he can handle the job, and that you would be pleased to have him do it for you.

5. Not Letting Him Please You
Many women are unaware of what really turns men on in bed. One of his biggest turn-ons is knowing he is giving pleasure to you. He wants to see you aroused, excited, fulfilled. So, instead of worrying about pleasing him ? Let him please you. By avoiding these five common behaviors that drive men away, your relationship will be more successful, and your overall happiness will be greater.

John Gray has helped millions of men and women develop better relationships with his phenomenal New York Times bestseller Men Are From Mars, Women Are From Venus (HarperCollins, 2004). For insight into dating and relationships today, visit Relationship Advice from MarsVenus.com.