Most singles want to know how to attract true love. Below are nine tips that'll help you attract the kind of long-term, healthy relationship you've always wanted.
1. Believe it's possible for you to have a long-term, loving relationship. Many singles hope for a wonderful relationship, but few believe that'll actually happen. However, believing is half the battle. This is no different from believing you can get a job or pass a test.
2. Figure out what kind of person is right for you. The best way to do this is to look at your best friends and identify in them the qualities you most appreciate. Your future partner must have the very same qualities you find most appealing in them.
If you value good communication, a desire for growth, compassion, playfulness, spirituality, and a sense of humor, make sure your partner has these qualities. If you have trouble believing such a man or woman exists, go back to the step above.
3. Learn to identify people who aren't right for you. This one should be pretty easy. Anyone who doesn't exhibit the qualities you value most is not right for you as a partner. An important note: anyone who exhibits these positive traits only toward you, and not toward others, isn't right for you. Why? Because eventually, he or she will stop exhibiting this warmth toward you.
Also be wary of people who try to rush a relationship. They usually cause heartbreak.4. Stop settling for people who aren't right for you. If you enter a relationship with a person who doesn't embody the qualities most important to you, you're just asking for heartache. At about three months or sooner into the relationship, you'll start to try to change your partner into a person with the qualities you originally wanted. He or she will naturally resist being changed, and you'll take this resistance personally and you'll interpret their inability to communicate, listen to, or meet your needs as a sign they don't love you. In truth, you simply picked a person who's not a good fit.5. Put yourself in places where you'll meet the type of person who is right for you. Where would you find the type of person who has the qualities that appeal to you? In what kind of activities would this type of person participate? Would he or she be adventurous and perhaps rock climb? Would he or she be focused on personal growth and participate in seminars and workshops? Inevitably, the places to find a person you would love to be with are also places that will nourish you. Build your community in such places.6. Overcome your fear of being hurt or left. All relationships end at some point -- some by breakup or divorce, others by death. There are no guarantees in life and there are none in love. Amazingly, we still yearn to love, even though every time we love we take a chance of being hurt. I believe this is because we inherently know that there is no greater joy than being in love.
Remember all of the times you have already gotten hurt in love. You are still intact, all parts attached, functioning. You survived. If you fall in love, you'll probably have to survive a loss of some sort again. But isn't it worth it? 7. Ensure that, if possible, your relationship will last a lifetime. There are two ways to do this. First, choose a partner who has qualities you value most in your friends. Second, acquire relationship skills. Setting boundaries, speaking the truth, acknowledging, appreciating, apologizing, and asking for what you want. There are many great skills to learn.8. Be unattached. Be about your life and only slightly about attracting a relationship. Those singles who focus all of their attention and energy on attracting a mate put off potential partners. And singles who get despondent over not having a relationship waste their time longing instead of creating a wonderful life. If you do everything else on this list, you don't have to think about being in a relationship. It'll take care of itself and come to you.9. Risk your heart, but be smart. Go out there, meet new people and date. Give people a chance if they have the qualities that matter to you. But don't take a chance on someone who clearly doesn't embody what you need.Master Certified Relationship Coach Rinatta Paries coaches singles to attract and build loving, fulfilling, long-term relationships.
Source: Relationships & Love
