Six Things You Need to Be Talking About in Your Relationship

Communication is the heart of any relationship. It is not the only thing that builds a feeling of closeness and intimacy. But communication is one of a small group of actions that absolutely must be present in order for the relationship to work.

Communication is essentially a way of connecting, of looking inside each other. Without an honest look inside, two people may exist side by side, may even function well in some ways, but they will remain disconnected. Not even sex will bridge the gap left by lack of communication. Because of this, communication is on the highest priority list for partners who are in relationship that works. From the very beginning, a relationship should be built on a foundation of good communication. Although a couple may not -- hopefully not -- delve deeply into all areas of life as soon as they meet, both people need to be aware that self-disclosure and communication are what will build their relationship.

As the relationship deepens, the couple needs to learn how to be in an ongoing dialog, keeping the conversation going and lines of communication open as they move through their days. And if the relationship falls apart and is being rebuilt, communication is absolutely the first step in re-establishing intimacy and love.

This does not mean that there is never silence or space -- there must be for a relationship to function well. But communication is to a healthy relationship as food is to a healthy person. Instead of being a troublesome occurrence, it should be a normal, everyday, ongoing, planned for, thought about, welcomed event.

A couple in a long-term relationship or marriage should be communicating at least about the following subjects:

• What's on each other's minds

   

• Any feelings that are coming up for either partner about the relationship and issues or events outside the relationship

   

• How they are working together as a couple, team, parents, etc., and where problems seem to be lurking

   

• Plans for the immediate and distant future

   

• Anything that is not working in the relationship for either or both partners

   

• Everything that is working in the relationship for either and both partners

   

• Anything else that either partner feels a need to discuss

Both partners need to hear they are loved, cared about and found attractive. Both partners need to hear why they are appreciated and loved by their partner. Both partners need to reach out toward each other in communication to re-connect whenever it begins to feel that they are not connected.

Master Certified Relationship Coach Rinatta Paries coaches singles to attract and build loving, fulfilling, long-term relationships. For more information about Coach Rinatta Paries and the myriad of services she has created for singles, visit her Web site, WhatItTakes.com.