The Kids Are Back

• Next, discuss the question of guests. Everyone in the house should be notified before visitors are invited. Friends who are accustomed to dropping in can be politely told of the change and the reason for it. One situation that disturbs many parents occurs when unmarried children invite boyfriend or girlfriends to stay overnight. This is an individual choice. Make sure you’re honest about how you feel about this. • Helping out with household chores should be talked about too, because there’s bound to be more cooking, shopping, laundry and cleaning. Responsibility for specific tasks should be clear. Guard against falling into a pattern of picking up after your grown children or running personal errands that they are more than capable of doing for themselves. • Privacy is probably the key to success in two-generation households. To the greatest degree possible, live in separate areas of the house with your own telephones. Some luckier families are able to convert a garage or a portion of the house into a complete apartment. For most young adults, returning home is a temporary measure. They plan to move just as soon as circumstances improve. For both you and them, being together again can be a harmonious interlude that cements your relationship as adults who not only love but thoroughly like one another. But it takes conscientious planning, and that’s well worth the effort. Robin Westen writes about health for national magazines. See what others have to say about this story or leave a comment of your own.