Secrets for Marital Excitement |
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This is my last chance in life.
You need a little attitude adjustment here. Although many of us feel time ticking away as we become more established in our careers and the kids leave home, negative attitudes like this can sap our energy. Thinking this way shuts off our creativity and love of life.
Never blame your mate for your lack of fulfillment. Instead, define your big dreams and goals and explore what makes you unique, says psychotherapist and researcher Betty L. Polston, Ph.D., author of Loving Midlife Marriage. Begin to envision and write down large dreams as well as small ones, such as eating at a certain restaurant, taking a karate class, and so on, she suggests. Make a list of at least fifteen of these goals that you would enjoy doing over the next several months. Make a contract with yourself to put two or three of these desires into action.
"Pursuing your 'big dream' will have added meaning in your retirement years," writes Dr. Polston. Attitudes that will help you during the empty-nest phase of your life will certainly benefit you as time goes on.
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I'm no longer growing or changing in this marriage.
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