Negative people are an unfortunate fact of life. Whether its the coworker whos always complaining about the company or the sister whose judgmental remarks make every visit an ordeal, they drive us nuts. Heres the bad news: were not going to change them. But we can learn to react to them in ways that protect our self-esteem as well as our sanity.
So weve gathered some great tips for you:
* Steer the conversation in a neutral direction.
* Talk about books, movies, celebritiesanything that will stop the complaining or snarking.
*If a person is talking about a specific problemthe high cost of medical care, the amount of work she has to dojust listen to them and try to understand how they feel. If you want, ask if theres anything you can do to help, but only if it wont drain you.
*Dont argue. That just draws you into the cycle of negativity. Complainers are likely to think that youre trying to talk them out of feeling angry, and that can make them even angrier. You can just say "Ok" or "I understand" and switch the subject. That can make them angry, too, but at least youre not spending your energy arguing.
*Reduce contact with them, or eliminate it altogether. Not every problem has a solution, and it could be that the complainer just wants to hang on to her negative feelings, no matter how illogical that is. If thats the case, they need a lot more than a sympathetic ear. They need therapy!
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