Letting Your Grandchildren Win At Cards
It's not a bad idea to let your grandkids win at cards--even though most of your friends may advise that it is wrong or a disservice to the child to lose deliberately. In fact, psychologists say it may be helpful to let little ones win, at least until they reach the age of seven. The important thing during early childhood is learning how to play, not how to lose.
Grandparents, of course, want their grandchildren to win, but we also realize that in the adult world no one can always win. We may want them to learn that lesson, too. But small children attach so much importance to winning that losing in a game may seem like a real disaster to them. In an observational study, one four-year-old was outmaneuvered in three consecutive checkers games with her grandfather. By the end of the third game, she was crying. Another youngster was challenged to a round of badminton and then proceeded to be trounced by his father. The child accused the father of cheating and quit the game.
It's clear that neither of these children gained any useful knowledge through these experiences of defeat. The games were serious blows to their self-esteem. The sense of comradeship that successful game-playing helps to foster never developed. Both children went away angry, missing out on the sense of comradeship that successful gameplaying helps to foster.