im so scared I'm actually losing my mind?

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im so scared I'm actually losing my mind?
I know this may seem a little drawn out and over-explained but I really need some help right nowRecently, I moved away from my home to follow my dream in the big city. It only took two weeks before I came to an epiphany of sorts that I really didn't want to be rich and famous, and those were only superficial idealizations. I decided I wanted to focus on starting a family, and left for home promptly in a hopeful, optimistic mood. This girl I had been flirting casually with before I left was excited that I was coming back, and so was I. It seemed as though everything in life was finally starting to make perfect sense. Her and I started talking almost immediately after I got back, and things seemed to be going good. She had the same newfound goals as I did about family, kids, a small house with nothing too fancy to distract us from the important things. We would text each other a hundred times or more every day and things started going really fast. There was a chemistry so strong between us that neither of us could help it. I have never fallen in love before but I am certain thats what this was. Everything about it felt so right. Where things got messed up is when I made the mistake of telling her how I felt after only two or three weeks. She told me she was falling for me too, but she was scared that I was too good for her and would only run away. She suffers from depression (and so do I) so I understood her negative feelings and agreed to do whatever it takes to show her how serious I was too. The next week went really well, we hung out in the park all day for a couple days, talking about life, our future, etc. She even told me she had a dream that she was carrying my baby. With anyone else, this would've scared me to death, but everything felt so good with her it actually only made me fall even more for her.Out of nowhere she started talking about how depressed she was and she wanted to be alone. She told me sorry and that I am everything she has ever wanted and she feels foolish. I told her its ok, I'll wait as long as she needs me to. The next day I caved in almost immediately, I told her I understood how bad depression could be and I didn't want to her to go through this all by herself. She didn't reply. I sent a few more messages over the next few days and got no response until about a week later she said she never wanted to talk to me again. This was due to some **** talking roommates of hers making up lies and I think I resolved all of that. That same hour, I ended up having to rush my dad to the ER. While my dad was in the ER i left her a message telling her how sorry I was for acting so clingy, and that it may have to do with all of the other stresses in my life. She immediately called back telling me she wished she could be there with me and told me not to worry about anything.The next day I thanked her for being understanding and supportive, and apologized again for acting clingy. She said its ok. Five days passed and she didn't say anything, so I asked her how she was doing and she was very brief in her reply. Its been a week since then and I feel terrible still. Its like I've ruined the realest thing I've ever had in my life. Don't get me wrong, I'm an attractive guy and have never had trouble getting women, but these feelings I have for her are so strong its literally making me lose my mind. I think about her when I wake up, every second of every day, before I go to bed, and even in my dreams. My work keeps asking me when I will return to my normal, happy self, my friends say I'm acting weird, and even I realize that I am. I feel like I'm obsessing over her and it's making me more depressed than I have ever been in my life, and I've suffered with depression for quite some time. I almost lost my faith in god, and I'm really scared of literally losing my mind. Like this emotional trauma was just too much to bare and is going to leave a permanent scar on my psyche. I really hope someone can relate and offer some advice
I know, this is going to sound like a stupid answer, but I think you should see a therapist. Talk to him or her about what's going on in your life. He or she will help you through this situation. Believe me, I suffered from depression too. Getting help really boosted my happiness. I felt alive again, if you know what I mean. See a therapist. You could feel so much better. Oh, and I hope everything works out between you and this woman. She sounds like a really great person, so I hope your relationship with her continues.


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