Same Thing Every Night

This English bloke went into a pub with his wife, sat down at the bar and said to the bartender "Mate, please give me a beer before it starts."

The bartender poured him a beer and the bloke knocked it back in one gulp. "Give me another beer before it starts thanks mate." said the bloke.

The bartender had no idea what the bloke was talking about, but poured him another anyway and watched it disappear the way of the first one.

"Quick mate," said the bloke "give me another beer before it starts." As he's pouring the beer, the bartender said "Look mate, there's nothing starting here tonight. The dancers are on Friday, and the band is on Saturday".

The bloke ignored him and just demanded another beer before it started. "Listen dear" his wife interrupted, "I think you've had enough to drink."

"See mate" said the bloke to the bartender, "it's started."