The 7 Deadly Sins Of Marriage

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By Elizabeth Narins for YourTango.com

Almost inevitably, you’ve all but deserted your New Year’s resolutions -- more sex, less bickering, more patience. But your marriage is still on the rocks. According to married co-authors of Eight Lessons for a Happier Marriage, one of these seven deadly habits may be to blame.

1. Criticizing
You're wearing that to dinner? You lost another client? Do your love handles really need dessert?

Your marriage -- or at least your husband -- may be falling victim to criticism. Let the poor man be! Easing up will increase his self-esteem and decrease tension in your relationship.
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2. Blaming
If you'd taken the dog out he wouldn't have peed on the rug! You didn't tell me we're out of milk! If you didn't snore I wouldn't be so tired!

Give credit where credit is due, but choose your battles. Before you attack him, determine whether his actions warrant blame, whether the benefits of identifying who is at fault outweigh the means. If your motivation is self-satisfaction, redirect your energy toward remedying the situation.
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3. Complaining
This apartment makes me claustrophobic! My jeans are too tight. My boss hates me.

Listen to yourself. Yes, you are a downer and a miserable person to be around. If you wouldn't want to listen to your endless list of complaints, neither does your husband. File away your complaints and focus on the positive parts of your life.
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brendamariee's picture
This is petty stuff...life is too short, don't sweat the small stuff. I was married for fifteen years to someone who hardly spoke to me, other than telling me who did what at work that day. The only discussion about 'us' was when he said I do everything, even mowing the grass, and he was happy with that. His idea of spending time with me was to be present on the same piece of property....me inside with the kids, cleaning the house; him out with his hunting and fishing gear. My second marriage of just 5 years was to someone who would grab my arms or neck and shake me. After being 'so in love with me and couldn't live without me', he let me know emotionally, verbally, physically, mentally, that I was not wanted there. So to those people who have to pick socks off the floor or put someone else's dishes in the dishwasher...please be thankful thats all you have to deal with. It could be so much worse. You could be the one on your way home from work wondering what abuse your husband might dish out tonight.
loree315's picture
I have been married twice, 1st time for27 years this time going on 11 years i learned so much from the 1st failed marraige.I learned men love to have their ego stroked.. i tell my husband every day he's the best,and how much i love and adore him. It's not hard when you really mean it!!!I never have to nag him to do anything all i have to do is ask and he tries his best to accomidate.I also learned i don't have to be right !! even if i know i am,i let him be. It's more important to him then me !!!I learned not to carry on with fighting and arguing no one really wins and every one gets hurt!!Pick your battles wisely and by how important they may be!!!And Sex is very important never be to tired or just not feel like it,a great sex life makes for a great marraige no matter what you have heard!!! never use sex for a tool...its a gift to share with that special some one!!!In 11 years i have never turned my husband down, and we have a great sex life and a great love life and he is the happiest man i know...And in our own space nothing is taboo,we do what we want, we are blessed!!i hope this imformation helps some one....
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