By Suzie
Human
Q: My wife is no longer very interested in sex, and we haven't had intercourse for a few years. I take saw palmetto for my swollen prostate gland, but am wondering how Taoist practices may help. The Tao of Loving speaks of "retaining the seed," but does this refer to the semen from the testicles or to the fluid from the prostate? I ask because if I do the practices and let the fluid build up, it tends to increase the swelling. Since I do not have intercourse, how can I improve this situation?
A: The Taoist and Tantric practices of "retaining the seed" -- or, in modern terms, controlling ejaculation -- are excellent for recirculating the energy that can be derived from letting sexual energy build.
As men age, it becomes important for them to harness this energy by learning to have orgasms without ejaculating. The essence of this energy is then available throughout the day, and is said to be rejuvenating and to reverse the affects of aging. It also keeps sexual interest at its peak.
The word "seed" refers to both the prostate fluid and the semen. The semen comes from the testicles and at the time of ejaculation is mixed with the fluid made by the prostate gland. Fluid can build up in the prostate gland, especially as men age and perhaps lose part of the sexual outlet they may once have had. Most men begin experiencing prostate enlargement at around the age of 50, and it continues to increase gradually with age.
Saw Palmetto has not been studied extensively, but the studies that have been done are encouraging. Though it doesn't cause the prostate gland to shrink, it alleviates some of the side effects of an enlarged prostate in the majority of men who use it.
The prostate gland is in essence a pump, and like any pump it needs to be used and well-lubricated to continue to work. As we age, we have less sex and our parts tend to go into disrepair.
To combat these changes, I suggest that you cultivate the Taoist practices by self-pleasuring as much as feels good and healthy to you psychologically. Have two to three peaks at a time and then, when you are ready, always end by ejaculating. Deep breathe and really take in the energy at each peak. When you get very good at riding the edge of orgasmic response without going over the top, you are pumping the prostate.
By doing these practices you will give your prostate three or four good sets of pumps at a time and increase the exercise it is getting. One of the keys is to relax completely when peaking -- don't tighten. The muscles around the prostate and the urethra are smooth muscles and need to be trained to relax. This will help with any urination problems you may experience.
You may also want to see if your wife would like to participate in this form of sexuality. She might enjoy the intimate time with you without having to have intercourse. And, she'll be helping you stay healthy!
Learn about Kama Sutra, Tantra and other sexual disciplines from Suzie Human at Tantra.com.
