Once you've agreed to go out on that elusive first date, where should you go? The objective of a first date is to see if there will be a second. Allow time for that, but not too much time, in case the date is a bust.
When meeting someone you know and trust, or someone who's been referred by people who know him or her, your options are great. Here are some ideas:
1. Some prefer an activity. Hitting golf balls, playing miniature golf, or strolling around a large shopping mall, with its variety of activities -- restaurants, drop-in eateries, places to sit and talk or to listen to live music, or even window shopping -- will fill the time.
2. Group events will show how your date interacts with others. Picnics rank high; they're casual. If the date gets boring, go kick a soccer ball.
3. Local events such as street fairs, festivals and concerts-in-the-park are often free and will keep you busy. County fairs teem with activities. Guys, be aware she may ask you to swing the hammer and ring the bell. Added plus: corn dogs and cotton candy.
4. A casual dinner in a fun, relaxed environment can be intense if the only distractions are the menu and the quality of food and service. The music must be low enough so you can hear each other. Watch how he treats the restaurant staff, and check out his table manners.
5. Certain sporting events are good icebreakers, especially baseball games. You can talk and sing (national anthem) without disrupting others. Games last up to three hours, but you can leave anytime. Bonuses: hot dogs, Cracker Jacks -- and you might see an interesting game.
Football games aren't so hot, since the guy might try to explain every play. Auto races aren't good because you can't hear. Professional golf matches are so-so; you get exercise, but have to be quiet when golfers address the ball. Avoid cruising on his yacht, unless you're with a group.
6. Enjoy a walk together (remember, trust has been established) around the lake, on the beach, in the harbor, in the park or at any popular walking sites in your city.
7. Some try dancing, when both people know how. It allows closeness and touching without being suggestive. And, you'll get exercise!
8. Movies or the theater are limiting. Biggest drawback: no talking during performances; you won't learn much about your date.
If you're meeting a stranger, your date options are limited. Put safety first. Drive your own car. Meet in a well-lighted, public place where people are present. Keep the date simple -- coffee or a light meal.
Tell friends with whom you're meeting and where. Ask the coffee house manager to keep an eye on you, explaining that you'll be with a stranger. Trust your instincts. Even if you feel comfortable, don't accept a lift to your car.
In all circumstances, have fun and get to know each other. Perhaps you'll even discuss where you'll go on your second date. That's the ideal first date.
