If you try to live in the circle of no control, you end up unhappy, chaotic, unempowered, feeling like a victim, he said. If you live in the circle of control, you live with hope and happiness.
What makes the difference? "Reactive behavior takes you out of the circle of control. Proactive behavior -- where you pause, think and choose before you act -- gives you control. Inside that pause between action and response -- that is who you are."
The second "C" of marriage is communication, said Jane Parrish Covey. The most important thing to remember, she says, "is that the way we speak to each other does matter. Words hurt. Word crush. Or words lift and build."
So, she advises, "look for strengths. Talk about strengths. Dwell on strengths instead of weaknesses. Too often in families, we dwell on weaknesses."
Dwelling on strengths helps develop unity and companionship. So does making emotional deposits in your marriage box. Sometimes, she said, that can be as simple as "saying the words, 'I love you' to the people that you love."
Source: Deseret News (Salt Lake City). Powered by Yellowbrix.
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