KarenSherman

Making the Best of a Bad Situation

No doubt, you've been exposed to lots and lots of articles and books and various other communications about ways to cut down your stress. Even I address this subject both in writing and workshops as well as teaching my clients tools to deal with stress. Why? Because stress can have very adverse effects on your health -- both physically and psychologically. But there's also another side to stress. Stress can actually have some positive benefits! In fact, learning how to deal with stress can make you resilient. You may have heard the expression, "What doesn't kill you, makes you strong." Growing into it More…

All That Glitters Is Not Gold

I truly believe that life offers you lessons all the time. What is significant, of course, is whether you pick up the lesson or not. Sadly, too many times, you only pay attention to the big lessons ... the ones that hit you in the face like a cold pail of water. Recently, I encountered a life lesson that I wanted to share with you. Though it's a bit of a playful topic, there's also a point that can be drawn from the situation. It all centers around my birthday -- usually a day that gets duly noted. A birthday tale More…

Another Relationship Lesson - It's in the Connection

For the last several postings, I've written about topics based on information I received at a conference I attend each year, SmartMarriages. At this conference, there are numerous workshops that offer a wide variety of topics having to do with relationships. In my opinion, the most poignant comments were offered by Dr. Sue Johnson, a leading couples' therapist. So, I have saved the best for last. Her work, Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT), is founded on the principle that everyone needs to feel a sense of attachment. She makes the point that the brain is a social organ and that attachment is a need that exists from the cradle to the grave. More detail More…

Another Relationship Lesson - It's All in the Phrasing

I hope you've been reading the last couple of posts I've written. They have been based on information I gained at a conference I attend every year, SmartMarriages. At this annual meeting, there is a multitude of subjects presented on every aspect of relationships one could imagine. In today's blog, I'm not going to discuss a particular subject matter as an entity. Rather, I want to bring to your attention something having to do with how you communicate to your mate. To be honest, this insight can have meaning for anyone with whom you relate to where you are concerned with your communications. The ABC's of communication More…

Another Relationship Lesson - Money Matters

As I told you in last week's posting, I recently went to an annual conference, SmartMarriages. Through several days, there were a multitude of workshops on a diverse number of subjects having to do with relationships from all different aspects. Since so many couples argue about money, I decided to devote this week's blog to this concern. There were a lot of very interesting points brought out that I would like to pass on to you. Hopefully, this information will help your relationship. What does money mean to you? More…

The First of Many Relationship Lessons - Cohabitation

One of the things I pride myself on is the fact that I try to stay up-to-date on whatever information is current regarding relationships. In so doing, each year I attend the SmartMarriages Conference where all of the top players in the field come together to share their research and insights on just about any topic you might imagine pertaining to relationships. I also believe it is my duty to bring this knowledge to you. Therefore, in the next several postings, I will be covering information that I learned during the various workshops or general sessions I attended. There is no special order to these ... they are all important. In this blog, I'd like to share some points about cohabitation. Go figure More…

Will You Still Love Me?

Did it ever occur to you that the reason certain comedians are so funny is because they have the uncanny ability to be keen observers of life? Their routines are about what they see around them and what we all know to be true. Like such a comedian, I tend to write my blogs from observations I make in the day-to-day occurrences of relationships. As I've often told you, when I see a similar pattern happen, I know it's a "sign" that I'm meant to learn a lesson and then share it with you. Today's posting is based on one such lesson. Love feels like a security blankie More…

Relationship Give and Take

Let's be honest -- one of the reasons you are in a relationship is because you want to get something out of it. Of course, what that "something" is can be very varied. But you don't stay in a relationship unless you're getting something from it. As a matter of fact, there's a theory which states that someone will continue a relationship as long as the benefits outweigh the costs. Once the costs are greater than the rewards, the partnership ends. Many couples have the belief that the relationship will be equal. This, in fact, is an incorrect expectation. When you think this way, you are likely to function with a mental scorecard only to be disappointed frequently. More…

Loving Life

"Life is short." No doubt that is an expression you have all heard and I'm going to guess that most of you would agree with it. But the question that is really relevant is, "Do you live in a way that embraces that concept?" Clearly, life is also stressful. There just seems to be so much to do. And though technology was supposed to make life easier, it seems to have only added to our burden of making life more complex and adding onto the endless "to do" list. The reality More…

Imperfect Perfection in Your Relationships

The other day I was doing a special teaching assignment at one of our local High Schools. I decided to speak to the students about relationships in order to better educate them about what to expect in a long-term commitment. My presentation certainly wasn't the romanticized version that is so often depicted in our movies and novels. But I also know it was a more realistic view that would better equip them to have a good foundation. I truly believe that if more couples knew what to expect in marriage, there would be far less divorce. The points More…