All Relationships Q&A

My daughter has strict food rules for her children, and I just don't agree. I think my grandkids should be able to have some fun when they visit (ice cream, an occasional piece of candy, and soda -- if they wish). Is it bad that I go against her rules when they are over at our house? Could it really hurt their health?

You've written that according to your research, the number one reason men give for not having sex with their wives is: "She's not sexually adventurous enough." What do they men mean by that? And don't women have legitimate complaints of that nature too?

I am 60 and my husband is 64 and we have been married for 5 years. We no longer have sex because my husband carries on with other women. By that I mean he has “friends” that he talks to sexually -- 95% sexually explicit -- over the phone. I am not saying he pays for phone sex; these are women whom he has known longer than me.

When I explained to him how much these conversations hurt me, his comment was: “You just don't understand my friendship with these women.” He is not physically intimate with any of them but to me it is still infidelity.

I have gone to counseling. (He will not go so I went without him.) He says I am all he could want and treats me wonderfully in every other aspect of our marriage. I have completely withdrawn from intimacy, and am very depressed. My question is: Why does he do this?

I'm a manager at a small office and am starting to wonder if my employees' "sick days" are related to trouble at home. Is there a way I can help without interfering in their personal lives?

My daughter-in-law enlisted my aid in wooing my son (I was sympathetic but remained neutral), and after marrying him has kept an extraordinarily tight reign on him. This precludes any normal relationship I might have been able to have with both of them. We've had many get-togethers but always, and only, on her terms. I've not seen them for four months (once it was three years), and their home is less than an hour's drive from mine. If he is in my area, she does not allow him to visit unless she is with him. I realize she can control him only if he lets her, but there are times when he has hugged me and said, "I'm sorry" without saying why. I can only guess. I do not try to influence either of them, do not ask them to do things for me (although I live alone) and am always friendly when we do get together.

Her parents live near me, and they see them. I do have a life apart from my children, but there is no substitute for my son's relationship with me. I do have another, more sensitive son and daughter-in-law, but they live out of the country and so I see them only once a year. As I grow older, the lack of support for me will become harder to accept, I'm sure. B.G.

I'm single, and oftentimes I feel very lonely. How can I live a full and happy life without a partner?