Youd think that, for a person who was raised in an apartment and in fact never lived in a house till I was in my 30s, moving to a condo after two decades of living in houses would feel like coming home.
Guess again.
Oh, yes, I enjoy my apartments terracebut it doesnt make up for the loss of my old backyard. But you dont have to pay someone to mow a terrace, you say. True. But walking barefoot on the tile on a hot July evening doesnt compare with walking barefoot through the grass. And did you ever try to play Frisbee on a terrace?
Not that there arent advantages to living in a large condo. I used to love the convenience of stepping out my backdoor and into my pool, but how could I be so curmudgeonly as to not appreciate the exercise I get just walking to the pool in my condo. In fact, with my bad leg, its such great exercise that Im often too tired to swim by the time I get there.
And thats not all the exercise I derive living here. How about running up and down the stairs half a dozen times a day to see if the mails in yet? In my house, I had only to look out the window and see if the mail flag was down.
One nice thing about living in an apartment: Though you may live alone, as I did till three years ago, you never feel alone. Though this building is well built, the neighbors arent totally inaudible. And Im still not used to having neighbors pass by frequently on the catwalk, not two inches from my living room and dining room windows. It kinda discourages you from scratching wherever it itches unless the blinds are drawn.
Of all the apartments Ive lived in, the one I moved to when I was first out on my own was the one where I most readily heard the neighborsand presumably vice-versa. I wont say what I thought the walls were made of, but after living there two weeks and seeing similar buildings being renovated nearby, I urged all my friends to buy stock in Kimberly-Clark. When a neighbor sneezed and I yelled back, Gesundheit, I feared that, given what the walls were obviously made of, the neighbor would tear off a piece of the wall to blow her nose with.In my present condo apartment I have yet to hear a neighbor sneeze, but I do hearumwell, if my upstairs neighbor ever needs a medical evaluation, Ill be pleased to confirm that he has a strong bladder function.Hearing my neighbors all around me isnt the only thing that kept me from getting lonely in my condo before I acquired a Significant Other. First there was the fellow who works as a supermarket butcher. He frequently brings home all kinds of meat. Kinda gives new meaning to the expression, bringing work home. Certainly nobody can say this fellow doesnt bring home the bacon. He came over for drinks one night and brought me ham and sausages. (I wondered what Id have to do to get offered steaks?) On another occasion, he showed up at my door bearing a stuffed frozen turkey breast.
He left me with the distinct feeling that that wasnt all he wanted to give meif you get my drift But all I offered him in return was a couple of drinks of scotch. And the meat deliveries stopped. This condo doesnt seem as bad as most about gossipping. Hardly anyone has tried to share a juicy tidbit about one of the neighbors. Or maybe theyre all gossipping about me rather than to me. Another odd thing, the garbage chute here is in the laundry room. I can imagine some bleary-eyed neighbor throwing her laundry down the chute and pushing in four quarters to wash a bag of orange rinds and coffee grounds. The laundry room is kept locked, which amuses my visiting friends when I take out the garbage and first have to get the key. More than once Ive been asked, Are they afraid someone will steal your chicken bones? Theres a newsletter published in the condo. Its full of official announcements but very little in the way of social news. But there are other means of getting information disseminated. If you sit out on your terrace, youd better lower your voice to a whisper before you reveal any secrets. Otherwise you are sharing those secrets with anyone in the condo who happens to be out on their terrace in the three nearest buildings. And if a neighbor sneezes, you still might feel impelled to call back Gesundheit, just like in my first apartment. You wont have to call out your Gesundheit very loudly, either. Theyll hear you just fine. I want my house back!About the Author: Journalist Cynthia MacGregor is learning to enjoy condo living in South Florida.
