How sexy you are has very little to do with how much hair you’ve still got, or how flat your stomach is, or what kind of car you drive. Age, or for that matter, weight, has very little to do at the end of the day with sex appeal or sex drive. How sexy you are is less about physical appearances (although being in good shape does help) than your state of mind.
Sexiness has a lot to do with the state of your hormones. True, if you’re in menopause, you’ve experienced a significant drop. There are treatments for low libido that your doctor can talk to you about. Hormone replacement therapy is available, as are creams containing small amounts of testosterone.
Besides hormones, sex is something that happens largely between our ears. Yes, your mental state has a lot to do with how sexy you look and feel. When you’re depressed or angry, you’re not usually feeling terribly sexy. Being happy and actively seeking happiness is a sex booster. When your outlook is sunny, you’re more likely to feel sexy.
Men don’t have the same problems about feeling sexy because they think about sex all the time. They don’t worry so much about how they look in bed, although they do worry about performance. That’s where fantasy for both sexes comes in. Fantasizing about sexual situations will automatically make you feel, well, more sexy. Remember your fantasies don’t have to have any basis in reality. You’re free to imagine having sex with anybody or anywhere. Just thinking sexy thoughts will trigger your body into a state of stimulation--which is, of course, sexy.
Sex may be the last thing on your mind when you’re juggling your busy day. And certainly taking the time out to have or even think about sex can be time consuming. But it’s a proven fact that sexual stimulation and the resultant orgasm helps keep our minds and bodies feeling young. So why not take advantage of this life enhancing aphrodisiac and train yourself to be more sexy? You’ll feel and look better and people will respond to you, even in the workplace, in a more positive way. Feeling sexy and having actual sex is rejuvenating. It’s the magic elixir we can all use.
Eve Marx is the author of eight sex books. Her titles include "What’s Your Sexual IQ?," "Flirtspeak: The Sexy Language of Flirtation," "The Goddess Orgasm," and "101 Things You Didn’t Know About Sex."
