What NOT to do in Bed

What are you like to make love to? If you were a different person, would you want to make love to yourself? If you answer that question honestly, you can probably identify ways you can improve your abilities as an intimate partner. After all, making love is a learned skill. While having sex is innate, it takes practice and effort to learn to make love well. Like any creative effort such as painting or dance most of us arent born with the ability to do it well. We have to put forth effort, and practice, to hone our skills. And guess what? Sex is the exact same way!

So, in my effort to assist my readers in reaching new sexual heights, Im starting a regular column about what NOT to do in bed. Take my words seriously, and youll be on your way to a more satisfying sex life in no time!! So today well do one point for the ladies, and one for the gentlemen. Thats because in long-term relationships, couples often get into patterns, or sexual ruts. And in my private practice, I commonly hear men making the same mistakes with their women, and women making similar mistakes with their men.

So ladies, this ones for you. Dont come to bed expecting your partner to do all the prep work. That means, take some time to get yourself partly in the mood first. Oftentimes we expect our man to do all the work for us. This places too much pressure on him, and creates tension for both of you. You become too focused on what hes doing rather than feeling pleasure, and he feels pressure to get it right. Instead, take matters into your own hands and start your own fires burning. Take a hot bath, slowly massage lotion into your body, dance a slow song on your own, or read some erotica. You will find it so much easier to be responsive to your partner when you take a few moments to wake up your sexual energy first!!!