If he's having an affair, it's a good bet your man isn't practicing safe sex with his paramour. In a study published in The Journal of Sexual Medicine, researchers from the University of Michigan found that condom use for vaginal and anal sex was 27% and 35% lower respectively in sexually unfaithful relationships. Not only that, but drug and alcohol use was 64% higher. That could mean the conception of a secret love child if the mistress is young, and it could also mean that your husband might bring some sexually transmitted infections home with him and pass them along to you.
A press release from the journal quotes lead author Dr. Terri D. Conley as saying, “Our research suggests that people who are unfaithful to their monogamous romantic partners pose a greater risk for STIs than those who actively negotiate non-monogamy in their relationship. Monogamy can be an effective method for preventing the spread of STIs, but only if couples test negative for STIs at the start of the relationship and remain faithful while they are together. If people do not find monogamy appealing or feasible, they clearly need to think about the risk this poses to their partner and consider whether an open relationship would suit their needs better, and better protect their relationship partners.”
Irwin Goldstein, editor-in-chief of the journal, adds: “More work is needed in both prevention of and education about sexually transmitted diseases. This research is of particular interest because it reveals that monogamous relationships are not always monogamous which can have resultant sexual health implications.”
Um, file that last sentence under "Duh!" But still, being on the alert for signs that your one-and-only actually isn't are definitely prudent. Has he been "working late" more than usual? Does he seem less interested in lovemaking with you? And – the classic – is there lipstick on his collar? If so, maybe it's time for a little talk, however difficult that may be.
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