Discussion
Stress & Anxiety, Hosted by Brenda
Posted 7/23/08 7:46 PM
Stress & Anxiety, Hosted by Brenda
Brenda recognizes the role both play in her life. "Stress and anxiety aren't necessarily pleasant company," she says, "but sometimes they teach me a lot about myself and about being out of balance or incongruent. In that case I can call them friends. Stress and Anxiety? Yes...been there, done that, and made the silly T-shirt...LOL. But learned a lot and still growing."
--Brenda
Posted 08/09/09 6:55 PM
Anxiety
Hi i need some suggestions. my son is 24yrs old, healthy, exercises runs lifts weights, he has extreme anxiety, which has caused high blood pressure, the doc. put him on blood pressure meds, which im totally against, do you think maybe the doc. should be treating the reason to as why he has high anxiety. Thanks Barb
Posted 08/24/08 8:38 PM
The "Buggers" LOL
I love it!
I think when stress affects us the most adversly is when we find ourselves feeling powerless. When we can feel like it is awful but somehow we will get through whatever it is or that at some point it will end or get better, then we don't feel so helpless.
But having the attitude that by golly you aren't going to let this thing (whatever it is) get the best of you. It helps to put you back in your power and to decrease the feeling of being at "its" mercy. :)
Posted 08/22/08 10:05 AM
Well, Bren....
I'm always encouraged to take the stress-filled blows of life by my faith; but also I am reminded during times of stress of the words said to me long ago by my Aussie brother/friend, XK9, " Don't let the buggers get ya down, mate!" I suppose he will never know how much that simple sentence has meant to me, and how often it has helped bring me through hurt and sorrow.
Posted 08/22/08 8:15 AM
Hello Kip!!!! :)
I haven't been to this page in a while. Sorry I missed seeing you sooner. Have requested to add you to my buddy list.
BTW, you are one who seems to handle stress very well.
OXOXOX
Posted 08/11/08 2:00 PM
Hello Bren & All
I've had to join under a different name because I couldn't get into new TA with the old one; but, no matter, I'm glad to see you again.
Kip
Posted 08/06/08 8:47 AM
Trying the link again
Posted 08/06/08 8:44 AM
Are You Hypersensitive?
I found an excellent article and I would like to share some of that with you.
"Highly Sensitive People
As many as 20% of the population are highly sensitive people (HSPs), who are generally high-strung, and frequently feel overwhelmed by experiences that others seem to shrug off. Only recently have such works as The Highly Sensitive Person: How to Thrive When the World Overwhelms You (Elaine Aron; Broadway, 1996) given these individuals not only a jolt of recognition, but a positive spin on their condition.
Aron’s book was a godsend for those who have been told since childhood how high-strung, nervous, timid, overly sensitive or fearful they were. Here was a mental health professional describing high sensitivity as a normal state shared by 15 to 20 percent of the population and framing it positively rather than as a flaw.
According to Aron, highly sensitive people typically share a number of characteristics: They are highly aroused by new or prolonged stimulation; strongly reactive to external stimuli such as noise and light; intolerant of pain, hunger, thirst caffeine, and medication; susceptible to stress-related and psychosomatic illnesses and deeply affected by other people’s moods and emotions. They are also highly intuitive; able to concentrate deeply (but do best without distractions); right-brained and less linear than non-HSPs; highly conscientious; especially good at tasks requiring vigilance, accuracy, and speed; and excellent at spotting and avoiding errors.
“Sensitivity is an inherited trait,” Aron says, “that tends to be a disadvantage only at high levels of stimulation.” Everything is magnified for HSPs. What is moderately arousing for most people, she explains, is highly arousing for the highly sensitive. And what is highly arousing for others is off the charts for HSPs, who reach a shutdown point once they attain a certain arousal level.
Aron’s research has convinced her there are genetic and biological bases for extreme sensitivity. The brains of HSPs, she says differ from those of other individuals. Studies have shown that they have more activity--and blood flow-- in the right hemisphere of the brain, which indicates that they are internally focused rather than outwardly oriented. The balance between two opposing systems of the brain may account for heightened sensitivity.
One system, the “behavioral activation system” is hooked up to sections of the brain that propel people into new situations, making them curious and eager for external rewards.
Another system, the “behavioral inhibition system,” compares present situations to past ones before proceeding and alerts the body to be cautious in risky situations.
Aron believes that when the behavioral inhibition system in a person’s brain is the stronger of the two system, sensitivity results.
Most important to Aron (a Jungian psychologist) is her finding that HSPs are inclined to be anxious, depressed, or shy only when they have suffered troubled childhoods, or trauma, or a series of traumas later in life. The strong “inhibition system: causes real inhibition only when personal history makes an HSP feel there are good reasons to be inhibited. Thirty percent of HSPs are actually extroverts.
HSPs process information differently, “more deeply,” than others. Because they’re especially good at navigating through information, they’re predisposed to work well with information technology, which gives them an advantage in our present society. HSPs also have uncommonly sensitive nervous systems and a more reactive immune system. HSPs are 30 percent more likely to have allergies.
They often have decreased serotonin levels, which may result from the stress of repeated overarousal, although the jury’s still out on that one. And contrary to what our cultural assumptions may suggest, the HSP trait does not favor one gender. Just as many men as women are highly sensitive.
HSP’s high degree of sensitivity and awareness of subtle clues contributes to their intuitive abilities. “You just know” how things got to be the way they are and how they are going to turn out,” Aron says. “It can be wrong, of course, just as you eyes and ears can be wrong, but intuition is right often enough that HSPs tend to be visionaries, highly intuitive artists, or inventors, as well as more conscientious, cautious, and wise people.”
Aron believes that, historically HSPs have had an important function in Indo-European cultures, which traditionally have spread their influence through aggressive domination under the guidance of strong, militaristic leaders. “The most long-lasting happy Indo-European cultures have always used two classes to govern themselves--the warrior kings and the priestly advisers,” she says. “HSPs tend to fill that adviser role. They are the writers, historians, philosophers, judges, artists, researchers, theologians, therapists, teachers, and plain conscientious citizens. What they bring to any of these roles is a tendency to think about all the possible effects of an idea.”
But don’t let the world adviser mislead you: HSPs are not always confined to waiting in the wings. Abraham Lincoln, Jimmie Carter, Ingmar Bergman, and Steven Spielberg are a few of the figures Aron thinks fit the profile of highly sensitive people. Still, few people are necessarily anxious to be identified as HSPs.
Because society often doesn’t understand or appreciate the trait, many of the highly sensitive shy away from being labeled that way. In fact, HSP traits are much more accepted in some cultures than in others. For example, a study comparing Chinese and Canadian elementary schoolchildren found that sensitive, quiet children in China were among the most popular of their peers. In Canada, they were among the least popular.
Aron’s interest in HSPs began with her awareness of her own “difference.” “I always thought there was something the matter with me,” she recalls. When she felt that she was overreacting to a medical procedure a decade ago, she consulted a therapist who suggested she might be “highly sensitive.” Aron, at the time a psychologist at the University of California at Santa Cruz became intrigued by the notion that certain people might have higher levels of sensitivity than others and decided to do some research. She found that sensitivity was studied under different names.
Here's the link for the whole article.
Posted 08/14/09 8:16 PM
This info is extremely
This info is extremely helpful. Since the link didn't show, please let me know. I also will look for the book. I have been in therapy for over ten years with a Jungarian therapist and am anxiousl to show her these findings. Thanks. jhart13@yahoo.com
Posted 11/28/08 2:04 AM
Hello, thanks for this
Hello, thanks for this article...i did not see the link to read more on this. i really think this may explain who i am and possibly be a big help to me. i have had much stress and worry because i thought i might not be "normal" perhaps if i see and accept what i am, i may put the energy to more effective use. i'm in sales for a money management firm...could this be a very ineffective use of my personality style? i think the idea of winning a sale doesn't benefit or excite me. once i have money coming in, i can focus on helping people and not the stress of making the money, which just seems too overwhelming for my personality or something along these lines. i am grateful for this article. it may help me learn more about who i am so i can move in a healthier direction. thank you in advance for sending me the link and any more information you have on this subject....please. Rick 949-388-2235
Posted 08/01/08 12:53 PM
A continuous battle
Living the way most of us live in this great country creates a great deal of stress and anxiety.
There are things that are for us and things that are against us, and the way we live from day to day is not always easy.
Just look at the stress running throughout the country because of job loss, house loss, debt, lack of income, sex, divorce, lack of family values, sickness, etc etc.
Too many of us "don't get it." "Wisdom is the principle thing: therefore get wisdom: and with all thy getting get understanding."
Healthy moral goodness doesn't fall into our laps. We have to focus on the good in each day -- growing each day in understanding then our values grow as we grow, change as we change cause if we aren't growing we are dieing.
Posted 08/01/08 8:34 PM
Clayt, do you think that we
Clayt, do you think that we cause most of our own anxiety and stress by the way we react to and deal with those stressors?
Here's another thought. I have a daughter who can't say "No" and can't seem to stop taking on new projects of her own when she works full time and has two children, a husband and several pets in her care. I am wondering sometimes if she or some of us are actually "excitment" junkies. LOL Then we complain about being over worked, stressed, etc.
Posted 08/02/08 9:12 AM
Brenda, love -- I sure
Brenda, love -- I sure do! Just as a simple example. Any of us -- review the last month of stuff that caused us worry or fretting over and see how much of it materialized into actuality.
We have been told forever that God has provided for our health, prosperity and longevity if we can change our patterns of thought to accept them. We depend upon God to be a magician to bring them to pass while He depends upon us to bring them to pass.
Posted 08/04/08 10:25 AM
What you think is what you
What you think is what you get. :)
I like the saying: Pray then mover your feet.
Posted 08/02/08 9:10 AM
Brenda, love -- I sure
Brenda, love -- I sure do! Just as a simple example. Any of us -- review the last month of stuff that caused us worry or fretting over and see how much of it materialyzed into actuality.
We have been told forever that God has provided for our health, prosperity and longevity if we can change our patterns of thought to accept them. We depend upon God to be a magician to bring them to pass while He depends upon us to bring them to pass.
Posted 08/01/08 11:19 AM
This provokes a lot of thoughts
I posted this some time ago:
Never look for this year's birds in last year's nests.
-- Miguel de Cervantes
To me, this would suggest that a past event (no matter how painful or even delightful) that had a profound affect upon you is not here anymore and it should not affect you.
I think it would be beneficial in some cases to completely forget something especially if it has had a long-lasting negative affect on you. For example if it profoundly influences how you see things, how you respond to things, and how satisfying or dissatisfying your life seems to be because of it.
Some folks have a measure of relief by learning how to detach from such unpleasant or destructive memories. This would be accomplished by being able to remember while letting go of the emotional attachment. Easier said than done, I might add. And one must be cognitive of what memories are there triggering off undesirable consequences in order to effectively deal with them. It might surprise you to know that we are not always conscious of these.
Too often we are anxious but do not know the REAL cause or root of this anxiety. We might think it has solely to do with something going on in our lives at the moment but if we were to allow buried memories and feelings to come to the surface we could more effectively process them and perhaps get our anxiety dealt with at its source. That process would be like stopping a leak in a dam rather than trying to put up sandbags where we are being flooded. It helps but doesn't get rid of the source of the problem.
What is happening right now in your life certainly can be a source for your anxiety but it is your interpretation and thoughts about the events that cause the anxiety and not the events themselves. For example a flat tire can be a nuisance but if you are broke and don’t know how you are going to pay for a new tire, that would make a difference in your response to the situation. Now perhaps in your past as a child you were told how tough it is to make ends meet or/and how difficult it is to deal with any crisis. Perhaps you may have gotten the idea that somehow everything is your fault or that you are helpless or incapable of doing things “right”. These kinds of thoughts can amplify your stress level and provoke more anxiety that perhaps the present event would otherwise.
The effort to begin to know one’s self and to explore your “roots” is not a job undertaken by sissies but then neither is being a slave to your emotions and anxiety.
Brenda
Posted 03/24/08 4:34 AM
Change and Emotions
I know about change. Never easy even when it is welcomed.
We need to move on and live but we also have to feel and honor the "bad stuff" so that we can move on without dragging too much of that unresolved, dishonored bad stuff with us. We can visit the past when needed and bring it to the "now" to heal but to bring it to the now holding tightly onto our "story" may keep us weighted down so that our now and what's to come will not be as fresh, wholesome, productive, and peaceful as it could be. We wind up in the ditch and can't get out so easily.
Even the "good" stuff can be a noose around the neck when you desire that it should be unchanged available right now. Things move. Thinks change. Things take on different shapes. Things are not permanent. (Thank God in some cases.)
*****************************
*********************************
InnerSelf.com - Daily Inspiration:
Whenever we suppress an emotion we physically contract some part or parts of the body. In time we develop patterns of repeated emotional suppression, which means that specific parts of the body must engage in chronic tension. Typically, as a person ages more and more emotional energy becomes suppressed, while more and more vital energy is tied up in sustaining suppression. All of which just plain wears us down.
To make matters worse, emotional suppression requires that we permanently commit significant amounts of energy to keeping everything stuffed away, unfelt and unnoticed. This places heavy demands on our daily resources. So much of the chronic fatigue that afflicts people in modern societies stems from this unconscious sustaining of emotional suppression.
We need our emotions. They provide us with the vital force to think creatively and act decisively. Ideally, energy-in-motion empowers us to deal more effectively with the changes and challenges of life.
EXCERPTED FROM the InnerSelf.com article:
Emotional Suppression
by Michael Sky.
TO READ MORE of this excerpt, click here
Posted 03/20/08 12:11 PM
Dead Links
For both "Words that Relax" and the "Body Age Clinic Test" the links were dead. I couldn't even find anything remotely related with either a site searches or through Google. Any suggestions?
Posted 03/26/08 9:11 AM
Here's a link I think you were looking for PROFWYNDE
Posted 03/24/08 4:29 AM
Sorry it took so long to reply
I think there are a lot of dead links floating around in Thirdage as time has passed and new people have taken over the web site.
However try these words for relaxation:
Soft
peaceful
content
whisper
breathe
floating
smooth
rest
lullaby
serene
calm
I'm sure there are more but these do it for me.
As for body age test, you might find this website a help:Click Here
Posted 08/18/07 8:16 AM
SWEET SURRENDER
When you can just let go, surrender to the moment it quiets the mind, settles the soul, and gives you peace.
It is like relaxing a muscle. When the muscle is tight and you notice that it is and then you choose to loosen it, it feels like such a nice relief. So too when we can notice the stinking thinking that leads to sadness, hurt, disappointment, anger, frustration, emotional pain, etc. and then as we observe it, let it go, and surrender the need to retaliate, or to be upset, or to be “right”, or to change what is, there is a sweetness like a contented sigh that envelops your being in a cocoon of love.
It’s better than Mom’s apple pie, sweeter than honey, longer lasting that a life saver, safer than an alarm system, requires no prescription with its side effects, and gives you a viewpoint that sustains you through all the ups and downs of life.
Ah, sweet surrender. Try it, you’ll like it.
Posted 10/19/06 8:43 AM
Take the stress test.
"Social Readjustment Rating Scale" by Thomas Holmes and Richard Rahe
When you get to the page, scroll down to find the scale.
Add up your points and see where you rate.
Good luck. ;)
Posted 09/06/06 6:20 AM
Panic Attacks
Anybody out there have any experience with these or questions or anything you would like to discuss regarding panic attacks?
Posted 11/28/08 2:06 AM
i'm surprised that i'm
i'm surprised that i'm replying to you on two different subjects but i'm compelled. i met a woman, Nancy. i met her on thanksgiving visiting a "nursing home" per sey. wanted to visit and see if i could be of help and just visit with some of the folks...Nancy is approx 70ish. she's in this damn place because of panic attacks...she has been having them after her husband committed suicide and her home burned down..they may be related...i'm sure theirs more to the story but her family is apparently keeping her there...didn't invite her to thanksgiving until she get's her act together. her friend betty visited her that same day and i gave betty my number and the name of a book by Byron Katie...loving what is...any more info on this from your end would be very helpful...i think their may be a real chance for helping someone get back their life and own it again. her kids have power of attorney (one of 5 does) she has contact with some or most of them but since no one has found a solution, this poor woman, whom i had a good healthy normal conversation with along with her frustrated friend betty, is on drugs to sedate her so now she really can't be effective or think straight. ...she will die here. appreciate any thoughts or guidance. Rick
By bandradzki
Posted 05/23/06 4:10 AM
This is a stress-reducing tool.
Never look for this year's birds in last year's nests.
-- Miguel de Cervantes
By bandradzki
By bandradzki
Posted 04/08/06 11:21 AM
Adding Stress To Your Life?
Click on the link below for an article that takes another look at stress.
Posted 04/01/06 10:05 PM
Third age stress
Generally, I never look at the forums here as they are so frustrating. Sometimes the last posting is months past. Other forums will have big gaps in the dates. This forum software has to be the worst around as there is little logic to the order of the postings. What other forum software puts the newest messages at the bottom of the page?
By bandradzki
Posted 04/02/06 5:26 AM
Hi VAGUY, the "gap" in dates is because people haven't
Also the ThirdAge format allows for people to go back to any post and respond at any time. Most folks like that.
I have tried senior net and I don't care for their format so I guess it is a matter of taste.
This kind of thing doesn't have to cause stress though. It isn't what happens to us or how things are but rather how we respond to them and we have choices. If something get's on the nerves, you just try to avoid it if you can or learn to work with the way it is. :)
Thank for popping in.
Brenda(host)
Posted 04/01/06 2:25 PM
Anxiety/Panic
When I had anxiety/panic I think I learned a lot about it. It seems like it comes out of nowhere and that's why it is so frightening. But I am convinced it is triggered by a fear that you may not even be aware of. When mine occured, my Dad was very sick, and I was hemmorhaging and needed emergency surgery and a transfusion. If you think about it, you probably had some sort of trauma just prior to your anxiety/panic.
I took medication until I forgot to take a pill here and there until I didn't need them anymore. It took two years. Also, I found that "joy" over a period of time helps alieviate the problem. At the time the doctor didn't give it a name and told me nothing which made it even more frightening. This experience made me very strong for worse things to come. I wish everybody with this condition a lot of love and joy. Just remember there is an end to it with a little work.
Bunnzy
Posted 04/07/06 8:53 PM
Reply to "anxiety/panic"
My entire life has been a state of constant anxiety and tension. Sometimes it's low key, sometimes it reaches a crescendo, but it's always been there, for as long as I can remember. I didn't even begin to have an inkling that something might be wrong with me until I joined AA and heard members talk about what they were like before they came into AA: they described my personality. And they described it as an illness. One member described it as a "constant low-key anxiety that you have all the time." I started paying more attention to how I felt most of the time, and I began to see how tense, nervous, fearful, and uptight I was--every second of my waking (and sometimes my sleeping) life. Waiting for the other shoe to drop, waiting for the sky to fall, waiting for that lump somewhere on my body that won't go away and gets bigger, waiting for the jig to be up, for the piper to come and demand payment.
Paranoia has usually been part of the deal too. No matter where I go, everyone is watching me. That guy walking behind me has some kind of agenda. Anything I do might offend somebody, so be sure to be very, very safe. Do everything you can to be invisible.
It's taken me a long, long time to realize these things about myself. I'm 38 years old. I realize I'm probably younger than most people who enjoy this site, but fact is, I'm not young anymore. Even my damn ear doctor told me today that I'm old, or at least old enough to explain my hearing loss. I don't relate to the young crowd anymore (a fact about which I am still grieving), and it's nice to find a site like this that addresses the concerns that I am beginning to have, even though, like I said, I'm not in my "third age" yet.
What concerns me the most is all the information I'm hearing about how extremely unhealthy stress is, and that it can kill. What a terrible thought: the very way I think about life can kill me. My normal emotional reactions that I have every day can drag my body down in a multitude of ways. The ironic thing is that I have nothing to be stressed about. I have a pretty simple, easy life. Stress and anxiety are simply how my brain is wired--it's the way I'm built. Anyway, thanks for letting me rant.
By bandradzki
Posted 04/08/06 6:14 AM
Welcome to Third Age :)
Loved your "ranting"! I can relate almost exactly to what you are saying.
Here's what I think about people like us. I think that we are "wired" to be extra sensitive genetically. That's one thing. Another, our earliest beginnings in this world, the things that happen to us, the way our parents or caretakers were (because they didn't know how to be any other way), and the circumstances into which we were born as well as the culture or part of the country in which we lived, all contribute to how we are.
But, my friend there is hope. YES!!!
Okay here's a website for your regarding highly sensitive people. Some of us pick up on all the "vibes" around us. We are super aware of everyone and everything and that is one reason why we stay so uptight. Elaine Aron
Also there is a proceedure called EFT (emotional freedom technique) that can help and often has helped me. Here's their website. EmoFree
Just click on those websites and I think you will find some hope there.
Please let me know how you are doing. Post here often if you want to. I will answer every post unless my computer goes kaput or I am ill or something.
Brenda (host)
By bandradzki
Posted 04/01/06 3:35 PM
Bunnzy, thank you for your post.
Anytime a person goes through something difficult and comes out the other side then is willing to share that with others it gives people hope.
It is difficult but not impossible to get from anxious and panic to love and joy or even just peace.
Thanks again for your words of wisdom and experience.
Brenda
By bandradzki
Posted 02/13/06 11:40 AM
A tool for handling emotional stress
Posted 01/05/06 4:58 PM
stress and frustration
I have been trying to follow the links from "Three Weeks to a New You" and have become frustrated that the Body Age Clinic Stress Test link was unavailble and the Words that Relax was not found on my server. This is not a good way to de-stress!
By bandradzki
Posted 01/05/06 7:49 PM
That IS stressful and frustrating! :(
Did you contact your host Poopsik?
Did you go to lost lessons and let her know you were having trouble? Or go to the discussion and let her know there.
Let me know how you made out.
Brenda
By LONOMO614
Posted 02/19/06 4:09 PM
Same Stressful Problem
I, too, was frustated when I couldn't find the test then I tried to do the Words That Relax online stress-reduction exercise and couldn't find it either!!! That actually made me laugh . Please let me know if you got help with this. i, too, would like to take the test!
By bandradzki
Posted 02/19/06 6:17 PM
It's pretty awful when a stress-reduction activity leads to more
Laughter is very healing and can shift you out of some awful feelings if you let it.
Some people have called it "internal jogging".
Words and phrases that relax you may not relax someone else so it is good to try some words on for size and see what feels relaxing to you.
Words like peace, quiet, or even the word "relax" are examples.
Phrases like, I am peaceful. I am okay. Experiment with that or make up one that sooths and quiets you. Play with it and enjoy yourself.
Just go on with the lessons. Maybe this frustration is saying to you, "Hey, when things don't work out, let them go and go on to the next thing. Don't sweat the small stuff." So maybe there is a lesson in stress management right there because you were unable to access the link. :)
One poster in TA that I have known a long time always says, "Let go or be dragged." That's good to remember.
By gingersnap
Posted 12/18/05 7:44 AM
I guess I'm at the other end
I guess I'm at the other end of the spectrum and worry/get anxious about things that may be growing that could be taken care of now and not when the problem has gotten bigger/spread. I've seen people have blood coming with their stools and they're sure a vitamin or "healing touch" will fix it...when what they needed was to have a routine colonoscopy years before to get the polyps before they turned cancerous and spread. A colonoscopy is a lot easier than taking radiation and chemo for colon cancer not found in time.
Gingersnap who just had her first colonoscopy and had a couple pre-polyps zapped so doesn't need to have another for 5 years.
By bandradzki
Posted 12/18/05 11:34 AM
Hi Gingersnap
I am not sure one can use the term "routine" with colonoscopy. LOL
But certainly if prevention is worth a pound of cure then early detection would be the next best thing.
By bandradzki
Posted 11/30/05 5:50 AM
Stress and illness
We all have pretty much accepted that when we are most stressed we are more apt to get sick or if we are already sick, then our condition may worsen because of it.
There are some "authorities" who believe that when we are stressed, upset, worried, angry, etc. our energy system is disrupted and the idea is to get that system flowing smoothly again.
There are a number of ways that people attempt to do this. First of all, there is the normal route that most people take and that is to see a medical doctor and get medication if the condition is such that a doctor would prescribe for it. Here are some of the alternative methods that can be used either instead of medical doctors or in conjunction with medical doctors: massage, acupuncture, vitamins, exercise, meditation, healing music and sounds, or EFT (emotional freedom techniques/energy tapping). There are perhaps others that I am not familiar with.
Our bodies are different at different times so my personal feeling is that we have to go with what seems appropriate at the time. I would never suggest that one skip seeing their physician for any condition but I do think that alternative methods can help prevent some problems or help speed up the healing process once a person is ill.
As an example: My husband had an operation a few years ago and while it was very successful he made it a point to listen to CDs while sleeping and resting that were music for healing. He seemed to rest better and heal quicker because of it. He has CLL (a type of leukemia) and so healing from anything can normally be a much longer process for him.
There is much out there that can help us to get our bodies back on track whether you call that righting a disrupted energy system or not.
Deal with stress or stress will deal with you.
Brenda
By bandradzki
Posted 05/15/05 4:14 AM
Terry
I think you message is clear.
Some comments from me:
I am not fond of the way things are done in hospitals, during exams or tests or doctor's office visits. There are many things to cause anxiety that may or may not include embarrassing procedures. I am sure that during operations when many of us are completely knocked out, there are things that go on we never want to know about. Just that thought about what may go on can cause anticipatory anxiety.
I try not to obsess about these things but rather try to remind myself to take control of what I can take control of when it comes to medical procedures. Obsessing is one way to deal with anxiety however. This fools us somewhat into thinking we have control. It is a way to keep fear somewhat at bay. I do admit to doing that from time to time but not so much that I could be clinically diagnosed with an obsessive compulsive disorder. ;)
This thing about colonoscopies has me concerned in more ways than one. My doctor has been more or less insistent that I have one done. My husband recently went for a follow-up visit with his doctor and although he has hypertension, the doctor was pushing a colonoscopy. It is as thought this is the number one thing doctors need to push for.
Bottom line is even though we should be well-informed and try to take preventive measures to enhance our quality of life through good health, I think that all this pushing and media blitz as well as the doctors focusing on these illnesses and the statistics, they are creating more illnesses than preventing. Because I believe that what we tend to focus on or expect to find, we find. This would be a major source of anxiety for me.
By FRACTUREDSPOON
Posted 05/14/05 1:10 PM
Marketing the ACS
Marketing the American Cancer Society
• IF the American Cancer Society, Prostate and Colon Cancer Foundations really want a greater, more positive response for their efforts
• IF Hospitals really want to schedule more “Paying” exams.
• IF Doctors really want to fill waning schedules with the straight, everyday, normal family person… PAYING PATIENT.
STOP telling the patient to:
• Swallow your pride!
• Get over your embarrassment!
• Overcome the indignity!
• Get THE EXAM!
SOMETHING WRONG WITH THE SUGGESTIVE HERE?
The problem is:
• Not the Illness/ Diagnosis… One can acclimate ones self to that
• Not specifically the exam… That too, in time will pass
• Not having that cable shoved up ones backside… although it is torture
• That X-Rated photographic image of ones naked posterior, genitals dangling for all to Gawk at and poised as if a male prostitute in a gay brothel… forever emblazoned on ones mind… and posted, glossy side up, in publicly accessible medical records.
A new Approach:
The Colonoscopy;
• With your dignity and decency in mind
• There will be no X-Rated photos of your body
• You will not be indignantly poised or exposed
• You will get a Positive, Clean Experience
• BECAUSE WE WANT YOU TO COME BACK
The Simple Cure:
• Get rid of the Doctor’s NEED for the nudity
• Eliminate the X-Rated photos of the patient’s private areas
• Ease the indignant display of the patient, (cover them whenever and as much as possible)
• Make it all happen as if performed “LIVE” on National, Public, Prime Time Television
Millions get the Colonoscopy exam and never outwardly complain (if you know anything about marketing, this is a very big problem)… they also will not return… Millions more will not get the exam because of the fore mentioned indignities. Thousands will acclaim they don’t care about the X-Rated photographs, Millions Quietly Disagree and abstain from the hospital’s exam rooms.
Fix this simple problem, and fill your waning schedules with PAYING PATIENTS.
SFC Terry Wilcox
US Army Retired
4120 Eulaton Road
Anniston, AL 36201-5804
fracturedspoon@yahoo.com
Personal Note;
The decent, normal, everyday, Red Blooded American family man does not pose nude in a room full of people (no matter their professional make-up), for Homo-sexually explicit pictures.
Why does the medical profession think it’s OK…
Just because they are Doctors and Nurses?
I personally, do not wish to be splayed like a male prostitute in a gay brothel, do not wish to be seen, poised that way, and for DAMNED sure do not wish to be photographed poised in that manner. This is unnecessary and easily changed… All the examining Doctor needs to do is, give the patient some dignity, allowing the patient is laid on their side and cover them with a sheet or blanket.
Simple dignity… the patient goes home pleased, and when asked, they have only good recommendations. Doctors make more appointments, improving their bottom line.
If the American Cancer Society, various Prostate, Colon Cancer Societies, and Foundations really desire to save more lives of the tens of millions of insured “straight men” by having them get the Colonoscopy exam; get rid of the unnecessary nudity, degrading acts and indignant displays that keep REAL MEN away.
The increased business also goes to the Pharmaceutical Corp’s and the pills they can push, Hospitals that can improve their bottom line, by simply covering the bottoms of their patients, and doctor’s offices will benefit from the increased traffic…
This is a Multi-Billion Dollar FIX.
Again, the normal, decent, Christian family man…
“Does Not Pose Naked” for sexually explicit, X-rated photographs and the medical profession should not force the issue.
By FRACTUREDSPOON
Posted 04/20/05 5:14 PM
continued#3
Talk about insensitive, and unnecessary!
Yes, I keep saying this; in hopes the medical profession will note that it affects the patient… extremely negatively!
IF the external photo were necessary… and I cannot for the life of me figure out why it would be… at least turn the photo over, glossy side down… to save the patient’s honor.
Photograph and post a sign like this … “COLONOSCOPY” not the actual thing.
If the doctor needs to know what part of the patient’s anatomy the pictures are from, simply write RECTAL OR POSTERIOR VIEW on a piece of paper and photograph that, or using a magic marker blacken the private parts, make it censored so no one can see. There is no logical need for such disturbing NAKED photos.
Just visualizing someone @ face level with ones buttocks, taking a photo and posting that photograph, for just anyone to see... Unless you are a porn star or GAY... is disgusting. I confronted my new Gastroenterologist; he informed me that no one sees the photos… so why take them… to antagonize the patient?
(I posted part of this on a forum type web-site hoping to get some feedback from other men that have had the exam, a bunch of GAYS answered stating, they loved the part where the Dr is at face level... again YUCK!)
My former doctor (the woman) asked me to return for a consultation after the exam, wanted to know if I’d like to see the pictures; I was actually interested (never seen my insides before)… I only saw the first picture… stopped breathing for over a minute… She thought I was going to have a heart attack! Gasping for breath I looked at nothing further, and I still remember nothing from the moment I saw that first photo till I was almost home… driving my car on public roadways.
Does the doctor care? The Patient does!
Look if you can/will, at the tape of Katie Couric having a colonoscopy exam on National Public Television, then imagine, if you can, what I described, why cannot the normal patient get such consideration and dignity? No one was taking external photos of her, she was lying on her side (not in the indignant position I was poised) and she was nearly fully covered, only minimally exposed.
If every Physical, medical exam, procedure or operation were presented and given the dignity as if being done on National Public Television, Doctor’s schedules would be so full they would have to import more Doctors from Foreign countries.
Maybe… Just maybe, a little consideration for the patient will help get men and women to make return visits, filling waning Doctor’s schedules. The Doctor doesn’t seem to care… The Patient Does.
Thank you for your time;
Signed:
The Embarrassed Patient.
P.S. I will not ever post anything on a medical web site again... Homosexuality is a sickness, and they infect everything. Homosexuality like the plague, needs new venues to infect. One of the best reasons they should not be allowed in the military and the main reason I voted Republican last time.
Imagine if you can, your young son going into the military, a naive 17 year old, not well versed in the sexual sickness' of the world, waking up with one of those doing improper things to him... yes... being accosted by a GAY (I'm trying to be really polite here). It happens!!!
I had to eliminate that E-mail account.
SFC Terry Wilcox
US Army Retired
Learn the ways of the world... Rule yourself
Remain Ignorant... The world will rule you
By bandradzki
Posted 04/20/05 5:36 PM
Hi Terry
It is nice to be able to get a load off your chest isn't it? :)
Physical exams can be frightening and embarrassing to say the lest. For some, it is more so than for others.
You wrote your message here because you had a need to be able to talk about something that really bothers you and causes you great anguish.
Most of us would agree with you that exams can be hell.
Patients need to be able to express their concerns to their physicians and physicians should respect the patient's wishes.
Brenda
By FRACTUREDSPOON
Posted 04/20/05 5:10 PM
continued #2
many patients they (the doctors and nurses) have seen … It is still embarrassing... degrading… and indignant… to the patient.
Our society dictates that displaying ones “Privates” is done in the bedroom… to one person. Indecent exposure is embarrassing… the Doctor and the Nurse doesn’t get embarrassed... the patient does.
Needing to return now; I suffer from Anticipatory Anxiety… fear of the exposure, the indignity of the exam, and fear of what they will make me do. This Excess Stress actually makes me sick to my stomach, because of which, I have put the return visit off for over a year. Unfortunately the Gastroenterologist is going to cut off my meds if I don’t return.
Think this lack of persona doesn’t affect women’s health too?
My wife says it’s supposed to be different, they are Doctors… yeah right... that’s why she never goes! While I was serving with the Army in Germany, my wife had to see an OBGYN, she was so mistreated and embarrassed by this so-called OBGYN Doctor (a man) that she still refuses to return. Hasn’t had a female exam in at least 30 years. She says nothing’s broken, why fix it?
Another woman explained to me, she was scolded by her OBGYN (because she whimpered, flinched a little when the doctor clipped a small piece of vaginal skin) told to, “Suck it up… Get over it… It’s something women have to live with.” That Doctor definitely needed to take a class on patient communication and concern. It was a Woman OBGYN Doctor, examining a woman. One might think that… one… would understand the feelings of the other.
The Doctors don’t seem to care… the Patient Does.
Next… I wish more of the good Doctors would have a secure e-mail setup.
Some people (like me) have such a problem telling their Doctors what is wrong, up close and personal… that they forget to tell their doctor about some of the other things that really bother them… just because at the time of the exam… it doesn’t hurt. Face-to-Face… note or no note… it may be so personally embarrassing or disturbing, the questions won’t get asked… and the problems won’t be addressed. Or the patient, thinking about the ramifications of the exam, may be too fearful to tell the Doctor (i.e. I spot blood in my under shorts from my urinary tract, not often, but enough for it to worry me…) as sensitive as I am to being exposed, I cannot tell the DR. for fear of the exam. I would be more likely tell my physician in an e-mail, when I’m safely many miles away, the sensitive things I cannot tell him/her in person.
Then the DR could prompt me for information when I do have my next exam.
If a patient e-mailed their concerns to the doctors in advance of their visit… they (the doctors) could prompt the patient… to help them (the patients) to explain what hurts… or has been hurting and where. The patient needs to keep a printed copy (of the E-mail) so that they [the doctors] won’t just sit there waiting for you to remember what had been written and E-mailed.
Doctors that know of their patient’s symptoms in advance… make better… more thorough, informed examinations.
With medicine changing all the time…knowing to check up on something new, before the exam… is not a cover up, it is plain good medical practice. I know it is hard to keep up on everything… things that were this way today… are not tomorrow and may be different again the next day. If the Doctor… GP is not up to date on a given subject … it is simply good planning to check up on the latest medical findings… BEFORE they see the patient… making best use of exam time… and because the patient may not be able, or desire, to remake the commitment to return.
(A friend of mine did a check on her Doctor’s board test scores in her state (Kansas)… she found that most family doctors “GP’s” in her area, had barely passed the medical board exams, some had taken the test two or even three times before they passed, yes they passed… barely.)
“OOPS I MISSED SOMETHING! And I need to see you again.” Is not a good thing to hear from your Doctor. (I cannot afford to pay for another, or unnecessary Doctor’s visit.)
Hearing your Doctor say, “I did some research on your symptoms and found this…” is much… much better. The patient is therefore assured the Doctor cared enough, to refresh his/her knowledge on a given symptom, and knows that the Doctor is using the most up to date information to fix whatever the problem might be.
I personally would feel more confident… knowing that this VIOLATION OF MY PRIVACY (Any man over fifty knows what that means)… is at least well spent… and less likely to be repeated… unnecessarily. Again, Not the Doctor’s privacy or violation… It’s the Patient’s.
A recent piece of dis-information disseminated by the medical profession:
A recent Television advertisement trying to get men to have the colonoscopy... states, "Don't be embarrassed of what you've got..." They’ve got it all wrong, AGAIN!
It's not the embarrassment of what the person has... it's the embarrassment and indignity of what goes on during the Doctors visit. It's the demoralizing, demeaning, insulting methods the Doctor's seem to enjoy putting the patient through, and especially posting photos of ones naked body, openly, indignantly displaying that which is personal and private in their medical files… Doctors don't care about the feelings of the patient.
The patient does!
I had the colonoscopy; as insensitive and indignant as the exam is I was pretty much over the effects, but the Doctor that did the exam had to add insult to injury… face level to my buttocks he took external photos of my genitals and posterior, in the most unflattering position… posed butt up… knees far apart (splayed like a Gay whore)… everything private to ones being, dangling… exposed for all to gawk at… Posted… Glossy Side up… In full color… First photo… First page, for all to see…
Talk about insensitive, and unnecessary!
Yes, I keep saying this; in hopes the
By FRACTUREDSPOON
Posted 04/20/05 5:03 PM
Anticipatory continued
. The Doctor doesn’t care… The Patient Does
Now; that Doctor cares, and the patient does too.
Demeaning the patient by saying, “I’ve heard it all before” makes explaining the situation/ problem that much harder. It’s their (the patients) fear, anger, disgust or concerns… not the Doctors.
Personally… to me… it’s my question, my situation, my unrelenting problem and to me it’s embarrassing… not to the Doctor… to me… The Patient… and it doesn’t matter if they have heard it all a hundred times before… I, the patient, had not been hurt, bothered, worried by it before.
A personal observation;
I made an appointment for a physical when I turned fifty; I’m supposed to get those periodically now I guess. The Doctor was a woman (Matter of fact; she did a better job than most of the male Dr’s) very nice in that she rubbed her hands together, creating friction, warming her hands and breaking that shocking temperature barrier, avoiding that awful gasp for breath after ICY hands touch bare skin, wonderfully relaxing. There wasn’t a problem till we had to go below my ever protected waistline. She left the room and returned with a nurse (yes I know the reason), still I was reluctant to lower my underwear past my pubic hairs… She looked up and remarked, “I need to see it all.” (I don’t understand what the need is… except to embarrass the patient.) I was so embarrassed, couldn’t look, kept my eyes closed the entire exam, have no idea where the observer sat; I never looked to find out.
With the Gay’s filtering into more professions, I’d rather be embarrassed by a Doctor that’s a woman, than be fondled by a doctor that’s Gay.
The point is, this Doctor’s way of addressing a patient, in a stressful situation… alleviated much of the anxiety, before she got to the personal part. Once below the belt line, she was more thorough than most male doctors… I didn’t mind that invasive dirty digital exam as much… (Probably because she is a woman), she checked my testicles, which the male doc’s never did (I’d wonder about the male Doc’s sexual preferences if they had, without explaining what and why first).
Then there is the embarrassment of the situation, being exposed to two people. Maybe the Doctor sees a lot of male genitalia…maybe it doesn’t faze her… this patient isn’t used to displaying his. I’m sure it didn’t matter to them I was so embarrassed exposing myself in front of two women, strangers, that I kept my eyes closed, it mattered to me. Some men might have just shoved their pants down, been overjoyed to display them selves to this good-looking Doctor… a woman… with a female nurse looking on, but not me. At least she didn’t say in a condescending tone “I’ve seen it all before.”
This goes to the patient’s feelings… Doctors or Nurses don’t care if you’re embarrassed… The Patient Does.
This doctor also told me that I was to check my testicles for abnormalities… That got a shocking response. ”Just what is normal?” I asked in a quick tone of nervous anguish, “I’m not GAY! I don’t go around fondling other men’s testes… how am I supposed to know if mine are abnormal or not?” She explained, and very nicely, that I was to feel for knots or lumps, that they (the testes) change sizes frequently, for me not to worry about that.
Hey… she showed some concern there. The Doctor Cared… Some DO!
Maybe it would have been different if it was one on one, or if I had some sort of wrap to cover my genitalia, I’ll never know. The doctor doesn’t care… The patient does.
My last doctor’s visit… a different Doctor (one of the reasons I don’t like CLINICS), one that had never seen me before… made no effort to get my medical records. All he knew about me (besides the list I typed) was, for the past two weeks I was having terribly painful intestinal distress (he knew this because when my wife made the appointment, she told the receptionist).
I had typed a letter explaining some ailments that come and go, so the Dr could make use of past symptoms in his diagnosis. I gave the note to the nurse when she was taking my temp, pulse and blood. When the Doctor came in… he did not have my note, and I could not remember or express any of the details I needed to bring his attention to (partly because of the fear of what would happen if I told him). He just sat there and looked at me, watching me straining, trying to remember my ailments. (Ailments that never seem to hurt, ache or cause me distress when I’m in a Doctor’s office)…. He didn’t prompt me, ask questions or anything. I know I’ll forget or cannot say anything embarrassing face to face… in front of the Doctor up close and personal, hence the note. (If I say that I hurt there the Dr will make me strip, if I hurt here they’ll stick a tube or something up it… etc)
Call it “Anticipatory Anxiety”… fear of the resulting actions the Doctor will take (e.g. needing a toenail removed which is extremely painful… easy forgotten, especially if it doesn’t hurt at that time, or having a long metal tube run up into areas not intended for things to be stuck into, etc.).
I wish I had called back later to complain to my regular Doctor about his associate, saying that next time I would keep the note with me… instead, I changed Dr’s and refuse to return to that clinic (like a disgruntled customer getting bad service). If the Doctors would remember that they are in a customer service oriented business… bad service… they lose the customer. That Doctor sure didn’t care… The patient sure did.
I understand NOW why women hesitate to go to their Doctor for exams. That smock does not take away the Doctor’s gender… or sexual orientation of the OTHER Doctors. If it did… there would be no need for two people in the room. Same goes for women patients having to spread their legs exposing themselves for a male Doctor to probe (I know some women that are just thrilled to get naked and receive such attention), with another person looking on, no matter how man
By FRACTUREDSPOON
Posted 04/20/05 5:00 PM
Anticipatory Anxiety
Anticipatory Anxiety
And other personal feelings exploited by Physicians
Telling a patient that there isn’t anything you haven’t seen/heard is as unfeeling as that young Doctor about to examine an elderly woman, complaining about a large lump in her breast, the lady balked at displaying herself, the doctor said, “There isn’t anything you’ve got that I haven’t seen before.”
Wrong Attitude!
It is not what the doctor has or hasn’t seen, heard or hasn’t heard that matters… it’s what the patient is accustomed to displaying or expressing that matters… to the patient.
Doctors need to understand the feelings of the patient from the patient’s point of view.
“I’ve seen that all before”, won’t work on an older man or woman… they aren’t that anxious to show off their sagging skin and /or “body fat”. But might work on a young girl, shy about disrobing for her first exam… OR NOT… according to a friend…
“I took my own child to see her first female pediatrician last Sept. At 13 she no longer could handle having her male Ped. check her out. So I dutifully made the appt at a new doctor who was female.
Well… in we walk, relieved we are to see this woman doctor, are taken into the exam room and my daughter dresses in the paper gown and I sit at the side in the chair. In walks the equivalent to a young Doctor Kildare. Well, both she and I stare at him and then at each other. I could barely get the words out, “Where is Ms Dr?” And he announces, “She had to go pick up her children from school, they missed the bus.”
Well, at that point, I think he was reading our minds and examined my daughter under the gown… without one peek.
He proclaimed her fit and all seemed to be growing in the right place. As I paid the bill I confided in the receptionist that Dr. Kildare had a rough 14 minutes. She looked upon me and I said, “well we were here to see Ms. Dr. and when he showed up, I think he realized our expressions read as if he announced that we were both pregnant! Yes, highly doubtful for both of us!” She laughed heartily as my daughter and I walked to the car. Then my poor child says, “Mom, will I really have my period for 28 days?” Horrified I looked at her and said, “no honey; he really meant the cycle spans 28 days meaning maybe 2-5 on, then off for about 28 days.”
“Hence the reason, we need to start seeing a woman.”
They (the doctors) say they don’t care… of course not… it’s not them in such an embarrassing situation… And… they have all their clothes on. I too have seen naked women and men… but they (the Doctors and Nurses) don’t disrobe when we do, I wouldn’t want them to… just don’t expect US to feel easy displaying ourselves, some of US are just not comfortable disrobed. They (the medical staff) should at least try to understand, like the young Doctor above, and not be condescending to the patient.
For example:
A mother of three… still young, pretty and lively in her late thirties, mid forties, … her hips have enlarged and she has lost that youthful, shapely figure she was so proud of a few years ago. This young mother’s breasts, once perky, now sag a little, stretch marks replace the smooth beauty of her once youthful breasts and stomach, which now to her… the patient… is embarrassing to display.
Though the still young woman doesn’t go around just throwing her blouse open for everyone to see… she still would rather have those perky young breasts and smooth flesh… to “show off”, so to speak, when displaying herself to the Doctor. The Doctor doesn’t care… The patient does.
Another response from my friend;
“For me, I am doctor phobic. I have buried two parents, both from cancer. My mother in law is now battling cancer as well as the aunt I am caretaker to. Thus I have spent the lion’s share of my entire life sitting in someone's hospital room. The only reason I had my first gyn exam last November was because my aunt's ovarian tumor measures the size of a soccer ball. Who knew someone could be walking around with an extra 28 lb. inside their body never knowing. Well, I saw the x-rays and was literally scared out of my mind with thinking that I had not been to an OB/GYN since the birth of my daughter (now 13) that I better get my own butt in there.”
And yes, I still bristle when I hear, "okay dear you can come out now from the dressing room." I just have some issues. Really one, FEAR!
Another example, this time using a male,
A 58 yr old “middle aged” man, still more muscle than fat, but one is rapidly gaining on the other, has gained a few pounds, a few inches, lost a few hairs (OK… more than a few… of each), used to have a slim, masculine, military physique… now has a larger waistline than chest size… unsightly scars from surgeries… and is extremely uncomfortable disrobing. He sure isn’t a “Chippendale Dancer”… and dropping his shorts in front of someone at face level with his genitals, that someone then probing into improper places, is not only distressing, it’s very embarrassing… The Doctor doesn’t care; The patient does.
It’s a matter of personal decency, pride if you must, in ones appearance.
(I posted this part on a medical web site seeking support, and got some of the most gawd awful comments... YUCK)
Next: the Doctor must learn to understand the story the patient is telling.
This IS the first time it’s told… by this person anyway. You (the medical staff) don’t have to feel the pain, or anguish of the patient… just understand… that to this person …it is embarrassing… it is disgusting… it is demeaning and very difficult to express. Try to help by prompting the patient with assuring tones of voice… Especially if you have heard it all before… you can help those patients express themselves (e.g. Ok you said you have a problem with… May I check that? How does it feel now?) Don’t demean their feelings with unfeeling statements… saying, “It’s nothing you haven’t heard before”… that gives the patient the feeling you really don’t care. T
By FRACTUREDSPOON
Posted 04/16/05 6:10 PM
Overexposed
Overexposed!
It’s not as much a matter of pride--- as it is respect and dignity.
OK… I got the dreaded fiber optic cable “Colonoscopy” inserted rectally, shortly after I broke the half century mark and after informing my Dr. (GP) of an episode where I had passed blood instead of stools for nearly two days (fearing Diverticulitis) they found nothing of course!
Now nearing a decade later a new gastroenterologist has taken over for the last one, and he has informed me he wants to repeat the exam because it’s been over 8 years, and I still have Acid Reflux (GERD) complicated with a Hiatal Hernia.
MY problem, I’ve gained a few years, a few pounds, lost a few hairs (OK; more than a few… OF EACH), besides being out of shape (other than round), naked in a room full of people (I don’t even bathe in public places), face down on a table (with the Gown going the wrong way), butt up on my knees, knees wide apart, everything private to ones being dangling, exposed for all to gawk at, and then having a male face level with my posterior, inserting a cable into my rectum like a male prostitute… is only the base mix of the cake.
The worst… was SEEING external photos of the above described situation…
Posted… first photo, glossy side up, in full color, in my medical records.
Why not photograph a simple piece of paper stating;
“Colonoscopy”
Instead of an indignant photographic image of ones naked privates & posterior, splayed like a Gay whore?
Taking photographic images of a Christian man as if he were a Porno Star will not get you the quantity of patients you need, nor will it get you the positive attention you desire.
Clean things up at the colonoscopy exam/procedure level… at clinics and hospitals.
Getting the doctors to provide dignity and decency to their customer/patients, as if the colonoscopy were being performed and broadcast LIVE on National Primetime Television, will put your interests on the proper track to national acceptance.
Providing that is really what you want.
I confronted the new gastroenterologist (from Pakistan or India?) about the external photo, he informed me that “No one sees them” (yeah right… besides the 5 or 6 in the room, the film developer, the person that posts them in ones records jacket, the persons that gather and file the records jacket, and anyone else that wishes, while the patient’s medical records folder is in transit), I saw them! Stopped breathing for just over a minute… My GP thought I was going to have a heart attack! I remember nothing from the moment I saw that horrible photo till I was almost home … driving my car through town.
If no one sees the photographs, they are not a necessity, so why take them? Doctor on a power trip? Control Freaks? The Doctors hate their job and wish to degrade the patient for making them look like Gays, right? Who else would want a profession putting themselves at face level with Male genitalia? The patient’s fear is not that the Gay Dr (whether he is or not) would do anything… It’s that they do… in that position… perceptions!
As indignant and stupefying as the colonoscopy exam is, why must the Doctor add insult to injury?
If the “Prostate Cancer Foundations, American Cancer Society… etc.” want REAL men to get the “Colonoscopy Exams”… have those men get their friends to go… and them to get more to do so… and so on.
CLEAN IT UP!
The various “Prostate Cancer Foundation’s and Societies, biggest problem is the “ IMAGE” Doctors leave the recipient with.
Telling men, “To get over the embarrassment!” “Wrong attitude!” “Not to be ashamed of what they have.” still not the right approach, these will only serve to keep average, proper and decent… straight men away.
Tell the Doctors to get rid of
“Their Need “
For the patient’s embarrassment.
“I believe I’d rather die with dignity,
than go through such disrespect and dishonor again.” Terry Wilcox
Do you remember a female TALK SHOW personality (Katie Couric) going through this same colonoscopy exam, LIVE, ON NATIONAL PUBLIC TELEVISION a few years ago?
She was definitely NOT overly exposed… Neither naked and totally exposed nor poised in such an indignant position; She was lying on her side… covered with a blanket… with only the absolute necessary area exposed. And… nobody was snapping indignant or embarrassing external photographs!!! Yes, she was being filmed, (from the other direction) she is a brave woman, and the project was presented with DIGNITY.
More of the COMMON MAN might go through the exam, at appropriate annual periods, if it were more dignity oriented, performed as if LIVE on National Public Television, for all patients.
Think about that, the next time you Doctors wonder why MEN balk at getting a colonoscopy.
Remember:
It’s not the illness… I can acclimate myself to that;
It’s not the exam… I was over that part (till I saw the pictures);
It’s the disrespect and indignity of the treatment by the Doctors.
Thank you for your time,
Terry Wilcox, Anniston, AL
P.S.
On the Terri Schaivo matter;
If conditions mirror that of Terri Schaivo, I reserve the right to passage rather than desire for sufferance, and not first wasting away for 15 years.
As Terri said, “No Tubes For Me!”
By bandradzki
Posted 04/13/05 4:10 AM
Handling Stress
InnerSelf.com - Daily Inspiration:
Unpleasant things happen in life.
They happen to everyone.
The only difference between a happy person and one who gets depressed is how they respond to disasters.
EXCERPTED FROM the InnerSelf.com article:
Digging in the Dung
by Ajahn Brahm.
By Melani
Posted 04/10/05 9:51 AM
Anxiety out of control...
Hi everyone. I am not technically new to ThirdAge. In fact, I think I have been registered for 6-7 years. I never post though, so I think it's appropriate to post an introduction.
I'm Melani. I'm 37, going through a divorce, and living in MI with my 9yo daughter. I also have an 18yo DD, and a beautiful 3 week old granddaughter. :)
Lately my anxiety has been through the roof. I know a lot of it is situational - going through a divorce, living in poverty, a car that needs to be fixed and not having the means to do so, which means having to figure out public transportation, taking care of a chronically ill child and now, because I stupidly switched her care to another doctor, being investigated by CPS because said doctor called them when we misssed a single appointment.
So, all these things are exacerbating my already anxiety-prone state. I have taken Paxil for years, and have Xanax for panic attacks. It's not enough, though. I actually ended up in the ER with a panic attack a few weeks ago. I had made an appointment with my Dr. but totally flaked on getting there. I have another appt. this week, and I am bound and determined to make it this time. What drugs should I discuss with her? Also, is there anything I can do dietarily (is that a word?) to help my anxiety? I am weaning myself slowly off my morning caffeine, and I am an ovo vegetarian.
Thanks in advance for any advice you can offer. :)
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