Stress & Anxiety, Hosted by Brenda

Hey, and anybody who does massages is a gift in my book. :) I find massages very healing indeed. I feel like an absolutely wet noodle after. They have to pour me out the door and into my car wondering if I will even be able to drive. LOL

Bless you for the work you do.

Brenda

I'm back working again at a place where I've worked off'n on for over ten years. It's a tropical decor business with a terrific ambiance...palm trees, waterfalls, tikis (up to 12' high), giant clamshells, birds, monkeys, gorilla, music. We sell bamboo, thatching and tropical mattings, as well as many carved wood items (masks, shield, war clubs, tikis, etc.). We also rent Hawaiian/Polynesian props to the movies and anybody else who wants a tropical themed event and we sell Hawaiian Luau party supplies. Los Angeles Magazine is including us in an article in the July issue...my photo might be in it! And a TV show will be filming at our business some time in the summer
!

This time around the work I am doing is primarily computer work. We have a HUGE new computer at work, and I'm designing and creating all kinds of goodies...finished our new Price List, Party Supplies Brochure, and redid some catalog pages. Working on a website right now...and later will start on a redo of our major catalog. All this is giving me a wonderful creative outlet that I've really needed!!!!

My massage business is slow but steady. Between that and my Mary Kay business I add a few $$ each month. That's always good. The massage is very satisfying...I truly feel I am helping my clients in a healing way. That's very important to me.

One of my very best friends died just a short while ago and has left me feeling very bereft. I wasn't able to speak to her for a couple of weeks before she died...and so felt quite disconnected. I know she is in a much better place, but I do miss her.

My son, Vic, will be 29 this July and his Mom will be 55 in September. There have been some times when I didn't think I'd make it this far...it's good to see I'm still here. I've been using St. John's Wort for the last couple of months and it seems to really make a difference.

We now have five (one, two, three, four, FIVE!!) cats in this little apartment. Lots of love from all these furry creatures.

Well -- LOL -- I think that's enough. It feels very nice to be in touch with you, Sabre. I still remember our ICQ conversations. I am back on ICQ again, with this new puter....so if you're interested.......?

Love,

Jeanne

Creation!

Down Time in Discussions is scheduled for this coming Monday, May 22nd from 10:00 - 11:00 AM Pacific Standard Time.

This will allow Real Communities to download ThirdAge Discussion files in preparation for problem analysis.

Yes, Brenda, talking gently and probably just doing a lot of listening helps, too.

We mostly concern ourselves with our own stress and anxiety when it pops up but what about other people's?

Last night my daughter whose husband is and has been working out of town for the past few months called me in a panic.

She works and manages a job, a new baby, a 10 year old, the house, takes care of the paperwork and books for her deceased Father's business, works like crazy in her church, and generally has way too many responsibilities.

She puts the alarm on when her husband is out of town. Last night after midnight, the alarm went off indicating a fire. Thank goodness there wasn't one but it startled her and then she couldn't remember where she put the number to call in to the dispatcher to tell her it was a false alarm and she couldn't remember the password to tell her when the dispatcher called. They did turn her alarm off but dispatched the police anyway. She was freaking out. So she called me.

I spoke to her calmly and gently. Then told her everything was fine. That having the police come was probably best. Has happened to me before. No harm done, etc.

You don't help others with their anxiety, fears, or stress level by taking it on. You help them by remaining on the observer side of the fence and talking them through it.

Anyone else have any thoughts on this?

Brenda

Have a joke to illustrate:

The letter from the Air Force colonel in charge of safety said that rocket boosters weighing more than 300,000 pounds "have an explosive force upon surface impact that is sufficient to exceed the accepted overpressure threshold of physiological damage for
exposed personnel."

In other words, if a 300,000-pound booster rocket falls on
you, it's gonna hurt.

...............................................

Humans have a penchant for padding things, using excesses, and complicating things. We use all kinds of times savers, why not start with simplifying?

Did you ever have to do a name change? It will probably take me the rest of the year to get everything changed. Some places/businesses/accounts require me to supply copies or originals of marriage certificates, driver's license or social security card to do it. That's not all but I won't bore you with it.

I will leave you with this one word that relieves some stress if I yell it loud enough:
AARRRGGGHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!! LOL

Remember: KISS - Keep It Simple Sweetie

Bren

Chocolate chip or peanutbutter cookies dunked in skimmed chocolate milk.....Hmmmmmm GOODšGingersnap›

Natural sour cream doughtnuts at Tim Hortons and let them go hard so I can dunk! ha ha ha ha

I love dunking in milk....graham crackers, chocolate chip cookies and oreos! Also toast in hot chocolate.

All very comforting!

xox

If it's stale, go for it. If not, go for it anyway! LOL

My dad used to dunk stuff all the time but he grew up eating a lot of stale stuff. It was cheaper and you didn't waste a thing. If you bought it fresh, and it got stale, you didn't throw it out, you dunked it.

Speaking of sweets and such, did you ever notice that sometimes certain foods are "comfort" foods when you are tense and stressed?

Some probably sooth a person because of the chemical reaction it causes making one feel more relaxed or sleepy. Some sooth because you associate it with a more relaxed time in your life.

But eating for stress can also add the pounds it seems for some.....bummer!

I gotta go find something to dunk now. All this talk has got me craving. ROFLOL

Brenda

P.S. Hey Cha-Cha....I need dance lessons.

Good to see your sweet face in this forum Pat!

I haven't seen the commercial either PJ. Either it is shown in Canada and not in the US or.....it's because yours truly rarely turns the tube on. They DO have some funny ones though. Some of them are so good/memorable/funny that people don't forget them and often will use the slogans for years. Like the one "Where's the beef?" Or, "I/ve fallen and I can't get up." The latter one wasn't funny per se, rather a serious message but people did take offs from that and that was funny.

Words or sentences from movies sometimes stick with us too. "Here's lookin' at you kid."

Pat, the Serenity Prayer is so powerful. Can't really hear that one (or say it either) too many times. I am delighted you took back your power Pat. What an inspiration and example you are!

Now Nettie, I think you have plenty of Wisdom. You just may not recognize it as such at the time.

Enjoyed reading all the posts. Enjoyed your company. Love visiting with you.

Have a great evening and enjoy the rest of the weekend.

Brenda/Bren

Well...Sabre, I've never seen those commercials, but hey...I'll laugh with ya!

They only part of the serenity prayer that I have a problem with is the Wisdom part....ha ha!

I like to interdepend as opposed to codepend nowadays. To me, to codepend is to not take a choice as to who does what for you. This leads to manipulation.

With this paid for tech support. I tried for years to find local resources. They always land up not not using the system to its fullest and don't have any answers. So this will be such a boon for me to have help!! Yippee!

A certain amount of ability to take care of whatever is at hand is necessary. So independence is a very good thing to develop.

But being able to deal with what is at hand and yet keeping your "independence" also includes calling in an expert, asking a friend or family member for a little temporary assistance. (I stress the word temporary.)

And so, even when we feel like we are being dependent upon someone else, we also are exercising some form of independence when you think about it. You are in charge of your choices and your judgements and reactions.

I think we think of the word helpless or victim in association with having to depend upon someone or something else. But that isn't necessarily true.

Feeling helpless or feeling like a victim in a situation can produce lots of stress. Empowerment on the other hand relieves it.

Spending too much time and energy resisting what is in the situation only fuels the stress. But making a decision and not kicking your own tail for whatever decision(s) you make taking charge of it, including paying for or asking for help, will fuel self esteem and reduce that trapped, helpless, vicitm feeling and consequently stress level.

At least that's how it seems to me. ;)

More another time about support systems and stress levels from another perspective.

But let me leave you with this thought: True independence comes through empowerment.

Have an empowered day. ;)

Brenda

So, when you want to get rid of not just the stress but the root of it, your task may seem too large so you settle for just relief and not "cure".

Sometimes you think you have the cure. You change jobs for example. Or divorce the rat. Or get a face lift (L0L), or whatever. But wherever you go, there you are. Relieved you but did you get the root?